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We go through the whole thing once as he and Sidnie watch. Thishakais often taught to young people as a lesson when they’re making difficult transitions in their lives, and the words are surprisingly powerful.

Tika tonu atu ki a koe, e tama

Hiki nei koe aku whakaaro, pakia!

He hiki aha to hiki?

He hiki roa to hiki?

I a ha ha!

E tama, te uaua ana

E tama, te maro

Roa ina hoki ra

Te tohe o te uaua na

E tau nei.

Ana! Ana! Ana! Aue... Hi!

It means:

Be true to yourself, my son!

You have raised my concerns, so listen up!

What is this problem you are carrying?

How long have you been carrying it for?

Have you got that? Right, let’s go on.

So son, Although it may be difficult for you

and son, Although it seems to be unyielding

No matter how long you reflect on it

the answer to the problem

is here inside you.

Indeed! Indeed! Indeed! Yes, indeed!

The Maori words are performed with vigorous gestures and facial expressions, and the sound of stomping feet, hands slapping chests, the deep bellows of the men, and the ringing voices of the women, reverberate through the whole yacht.

I can see Mack getting emotional as he watches us all perform, and feel a touch of pity for him as he doesn’t know what’s coming. Sure enough, as Koro calls to repeat thehaka, “Tika tonu! Tika tonu!” and Sidnie adopts the wide eyes and trembling hand gestures of the women and calls back, “U-e!” Indeed! and begins performing the dance, Mack’s emotion spills over, and he has to stare hard at the ground, fighting for control. Emotional herself, Sidnie doesn’t stop but touches his arm, encouraging him, and after a few seconds he finally joins in too, copying our movements as he says the words. He locks eyes with me—he knows I set this up—and for a moment time slips away, and we could be any two guys in Maori history, doing their war dance. It’s a powerful performance, especially with everyone in their wedding finery, a celebration of their new life together, and I don’t think there’s a dry eye on the yacht by the time we’re done.

The other guests cheer and give a huge round of applause, and everyone breaks up to hug and congratulate us on the performance. Mack comes over to thank all his family, hugging them all in turn starting with his grandfather. When he’s done, he stands before me, and we smile at each other.

“Your idea, I’m guessing,” he says.

I glance at Sidnie, who’s chatting to some of his family.

“Actually it was hers,” I say. “She wanted to learn it for you.”

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