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I nod in understanding. “I didn’t see you have sex with those women. One was going down on you, and the other was all over you, but you weren’t really participating. Maybe you didn’t have sex with them. Maybe you did. We’ll never know. All that matters is that we’re both here now. You’re clean and sober, and we’re living for the moment. I won’t punish you for your past because it’s not fair to you, but I will tell you right now, like the papers we signed for Rory, that if you use, we’re gone. The same goes for if you cheat on me. I won’t tolerate it.”
“That’ll never happen,” Gage says, his voice strong and determined. “I meant what I said, Sadie. You’re the only one for me. I want your present, but I also want your future.” He kisses me softly, tenderly, making me sigh into his touch. “And I’m going to spend every day showing you that until you fully understand and believe it.”
“Baby, wake up,” Gage murmurs into my ear.
I crack a lid open and see it’s still dark outside, then listen for Rory. When I don’t hear her, telling me she’s still asleep, I shake my head and roll away from him, wanting to sleep a little longer. When you’re a mom, you never take sleep for granted, and when you spend all night getting fucked by a man like Gage, well, you need every minute of rest you can get.
“Rory’s awake, baby, and the Easter Bunny came.”
“What?” I ask, rolling back over and looking up at him. “What are you talking—?”
As if on cue, Rory shrieks from her room, “Ow, ow!” demanding to be let out of her crib.
She goes quiet, and then a loud bang rings out, making Gage and me go running. When we arrive at her room, we find her toddling toward the door, a huge grin lighting up her face.
“Holy shit,” Gage breathes, lifting her into his arms. “She just pulled a damn Spider-Man and climbed her ass out.”
“Ow, ow!” She giggles as Gage blows raspberries into her neck and settles her on the changing table to change her diaper.
“The crib is at the lowest point. Looks like it’s time for a big girl bed.” I give Rory a kiss on her forehead.
“Big girl bed?”
“Yep, a toddler bed. It’s low to the ground so she won’t fall out like in the crib. Collin moved into one just after his first birthday,” I say, remembering the day we surprised him with his race car bed. It was just before Vincent got promoted at work, before he started working too many hours, despite his dad telling him he didn’t have anything to prove. Before the pills came into play and turned my husband into a stranger. Picking out the bed was one of the last memories I have of him being sober and of us as a happy family.
“Well, it looks like Princess Rory will be getting a big girl bed for her birthday,” Gage says, bringing me back to the present. “Everything’s closed today for Easter, but we can go shopping tomorrow.” He leans over and gives Rory a kiss on her cheek, then sets her on the floor.
“Where’d you get that dress?” I ask, watching as Rory toddles out of the room in a cute multicolored pastel dress with tiny Easter eggs all over the tutu.
“The Easter Bunny brought it.” Gage shrugs.
“Oh, yeah?” I say with a laugh, remembering he said the Easter Bunny came when he was trying to wake me up. “What else did he bring?”
“Mama!” Rory shrieks.
“Better go find out.” Gage winks, taking off after Rory.
The living room is filled with pastel-colored balloons, and on the coffee table, right at Rory’s level, is a massive Easter basket, filled to the brim with toys and stuffed animals.
After taking a picture of Rory with the basket, Gage sets it on the floor, and Rory attacks it, finding a large stuffed bunny and bringing it to her chest to hug and kiss it.
As I watch Gage and Rory tear through the basket, memories of Collin’s excitement hit me hard, but instead of letting myself wallow, I allow myself to embrace the memory before I bring myself back to the moment and sit with Gage and Rory, choosing to live in the now.
“Thank you,” I tell him, kissing his cheek after we lay Rory down for her morning nap. After she wakes up, we’ll head to Declan and Kendall’s for an Easter barbecue.
“For what?” Gage pulls me into his arms and sits on the couch with me on his lap.
“For playing Easter Bunny when I couldn’t.”
He quirks a brow, so I explain, wanting him to know what’s going through my head. A part of letting him in means talking to him, even when it’s hard. “When we were visiting the Easter Bunny, I wasn’t completely honest. I said that when Rory got older, she would get a basket, but the truth is, when Collin was Rory’s age, we celebrated the holidays. I would dress him up and take pictures for Christmas, Easter, and even Valentine’s Day. We would go see Santa and the Easter Bunny, and even though he wasn’t even a year old yet, there were presents under the tree from Santa and a basket from the bunny.
