Page 62 of Star Season


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I shifted on my feet. “That’s, uh, you know… I don’t just go around killing people every day.”

“You okay?”

“Yeah, totally okay.” I nodded. “Yeah, I don’t feelanythingabout that. But my ability to feel shame or regret, it’s kind ofoff.”

She nodded slowly. “That’s probably normal.”

“Normal?”

“Well, whenanyspecies is turned on, we have a lesser capacity for those sorts of emotions. I think it’s necessary, because otherwise, we’d probably not mate at all. It’s a sort of gross and humiliating kind of activity, what with all the fluids and nudity? Arousal has to override those sorts of emotions or a species will die out. It’s probably just more pronounced with you?”

That actually made sense. I was driven to pass on my genetic material, and anything that would get in the way of that—like feeling ashamed over killing competitors—needed to go if I was to be successful. Natural selection would ensure that those of us who did lose our shame were the most likely to breed and so the trait would be passed on.

“Did you really like it the first time?” I couldn’t believe she did. She’d been terrified. I’d smelled her fear. Admittedly, her fear scent had made me even more aroused, which was very, very fucked up, but I guessed that must also be part of it, of the thing we were talking about.

“It was intense,” she said.

“Good intense? Really?”

“No.” She furrowed her brow. “Not exactly good. Kind of traumatizing, actually, but, um, not as bad as it should have been either. Just… intense. And I don’t feel anything toward you like I’d feel if you’d assaulted me, so I don’t think you did.”

“But… would you? Like, maybe it’s some weird psychological survival thing. If you’re traumatized, maybe it’s a coping mechanism.”

She considered. “It’s possible.”

“I need to keep my hands off of you and my cock out of you,” I said.

“Well… maybe, but…”

“I really don’t think I will, though,” I muttered.

“Good,” she said, squaring her shoulders. “Let’s stop talking about it and just accept the fact we’re fucking for the duration?”

“Yeah,” I said. “Okay.”

We were quiet.

“There seems to be an exception,” she said.

“What are you talking about?”

“Your shame and regret?” she said. “It’s still on when it comes to me.”

“No, it’s not or I’d stop fucking you,” I said.

“But you care,” she said. “Maybe just because I’m your, um, your mate, and you need to protect me in case of, uh, of offspring.”

“Yeah, right,” I said. “I guess that makes sense.”

“Didn’t you say that when your ancestors would come up here, they’d protect their women from competitive males? They’d probably also, uh, you know, try to keep the women with them by making them comfortable however they could,” she said.

“I’mnotmaking you comfortable.”

“Well, you…” She sighed at me. “You docareabout my comfort.” A pause. “Don’t you?”

I sighed again, looking at her. “Shei, I do… I feel…”

She nodded. “Me too.”

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