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“Yes,” I agreed in a throaty voice. “Your cock is very, very nice. To look at, and to touch, and to feel inside me. But I’m partial to your pleasure cock, too.”
“Because it makes you come,” he said, tightening his grip on me.
“Well,sometimesit does,” I said pointedly. “When someone can keep from beingpremature.”
He chuckled again, nuzzling the top of my head. “I’m not worthy of you, shei.”
“I don’t know. You do redeem yourself admirably.”
“I want to make you happy,” he said. “I wish I could make you half as happy as you make me.”
Don’t say things like that.“You don’t think I’m as happy as you are?”
“I don’t think you could be. I’m delirious.”
You’re just going to make this harder, Holston.I burrowed my face into his skin. “That’s only because you’re hopped up on whatever chemical cocktail your brain is making to make you mate me,” I muttered. “None of this is real.”
He sighed. “Shit.”
I moaned into his skin.
He stroked the back of my hair. “No, you’re right, shei. This will all wear off. And we’ll get out of this somehow, even if we’re stuck here for the entire Star Season. And then you’ll go back to your life with the resistance, and I’ll go back to my life here, and…”
“Let’s not talk about this either,” I groaned.
“There’s a lot of things you don’t want to talk about.”
“A lot of things are very fucked up!”
“It’s only, it feels—”
“Iknowthat.”
He sighed. He let go of me.
I rolled away from him.
It was quiet.
“Sorry,” he said finally.
I sat up. “No, don’t be sorry. I’m the one who said we should pretend. I should have gone with it.” I rubbed my forehead. “Give me a second, and I’ll figure out a way to do exactly that. Pretend.”
“Maybe we shouldn’t,” he sighed. He sat up too and he kissed the top of my shoulder. “All of this is bad enough without lying to ourselves about it all.”
This hit me hard for some reason. My throat went tight and painful, and I had to fight the tears that stung my eyes.
“Shei, I’m so sorry about this,” he murmured. “I’m so—”
“Don’t,” I said in a very strained voice. I got up from the bed and yanked on my clothes. “I’m going to check on the Abbunian woman.”
He nodded slowly. “Yeah, I guess that’s a good thing to do.”
I palmed the controls and the door slid open with a whoosh, but I hesitated before going out into the corridor. I turned to look at him. “If we go back now, get away from the pollen influence, will you…?” I nodded at his now-soft penis, which was lying against his leg.
“Uh, you mean, will the rut end?”
I nodded.
