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He says it like he’s proving a point without being condescending to me. As odd as it sounds, I find it somewhatcomforting. Having grown up with a brother who needed to win arguments, it’s a change of pace.
“I knew it!” Sebastian says.
A car that looks very much like the one that pulled out in front of us rolls by with two men in it, their heads swivel and they watch us. Two Eastern European looking guys with shaved heads, square jaws, and sunken cheeks trace us as they pass. A part of me wants to brush it off as coincidence. But the vague shape of the car in my memories is the same. “Shit,” I utter.
It also matches the car we saw at the first motel.
My heart begins to race, and we sit there in silence for a minute. “What’re we gonna do then?” My voice doesn’t shake, despite my body practically humming.
Sebastian’s success in proving his theory right has brought him to a stop. It takes him a few moments to process my question. “We’ll keep driving.”
“Following them?” I ask, my hands turning numb from the adrenaline. I need to calm down. Or not. Someone is following us and trying to ram us off the road!What happened to the easy drop off?
“No,” Sebastian says. “We’ll try to keep them in our sights. But I’m hoping thatthemknowing thatIknow has spooked ‘em to stay away.”
I nod but don’t say anything. Sebastian nods but doesn’t say anything. Suddenly everything I was thinking this morning, silly games of ‘are we together’ or ‘are we not’, seems just exactly that. Silly. I feel comfortable being in the cab with Seb. He’s big and muscular. No one wants to mess with guys who are big and muscly. Even other muscly guys, I’m guessing, don’t like messing with other muscly guys. I don’t even want to imagine what it’d be like to get punched by one of these men. Let alone fight them. The two in the car didn’t look as big as Seb, but they were driving past at sixty miles an hour…
We’re cruising along the highway by the time I come back. And I’ve had a change of heart. Five minutes ago, I believed in thinking that what I was thinking this morning was silly, but current me doesn't think so. I’ve calmed down from our pull over experiment and want to know what Sebastian thinks of us. It’s fantastic timing, I know, but I feel like we should discuss it…
If not the kiss, at least the sex. The sex was absolutely mind blowing. I look at Sebastian slumped over the steering wheel, his body taut and muscles bulging under his little jacket. He wore things to be comfortable in the car, yet I feel like he wore things to show off his muscles.Is this how comfortable Sebastian makes me feel?We’ve just confirmed to our own paranoid brains that we’re being followed, and within ten minutes I can be day dreaming over him? Seems it’s the case—
“So I got a text last night,” Sebastian begins.
My mind goes blank. I freeze up and my heart clenches,what text?
“From Carlos.”
Oh.Him.My heart relaxes.It’s fine.But I suppose we’ve had to discuss Carlos at some point too. Not that I really want to…
“How is he?” he asks me.
My eyebrows do a dance of surprise; the reaction makes him chuckle. “Shouldn’t I be the one asking you? He lives with you.”
Sebastian nods. “I know, I just mean maybe he mentioned more things to you.”
‘I think you’re the one he’s most honest with.”
Sebastian errs now. He goes to talk and then shrugs. “I don’t think so. Not anymore, at least. Did he tell you about moving north?”
“Well, he moved north with Leah,” I say, my gesturing in the air likethatreason in itself was questionable. Maybe the better explanation would be that he escaped north.
“Of course.” Seb ticks it off. “I also know he found your mother’s accident pretty overwhelming.”
“We all did.” I fold my arms. The understatement of the year has just been made.
“I know how difficult it was for you.” Seb reaches over and takes my hand.
I look down at the gesture.
“I don’t think he meant it the way it may have happened, though,” Seb offers.
I take my hand away.How else does a brother disappearing after our mother has a near fatal stroke come off?“I think he did.” I sigh, and remove my hand. “I know Carlos is your best-friend. I know you guys have history, and that is what is hard forus—” There, I’ve had my small jab. He can think about that while he drives. “But Mom’s accident just gave him an excuse to leave. He was already wanting to jump ship.”
Sebastian chews his lips. He obviously thinks otherwise.
“It did affect him,” Sebastian finally admits. “He just didn’t know how to express it.”
“Which is much of Carlos’ life,” I say.
