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“You’ll like the one in your left hand better.”
I spun to see Asher standing there holding a basket full of produce. He smiled. “How you doing?” he questioned.
“I’ve been better.” I shrugged, turning my attention back to the salads in my hand.
“If you choose the one in your right hand, you’ll have to pick out all the sliced olives,” he said, stepping closer. My body immediately responded to the warmth his body was giving off.
I nodded and placed the other salad into my basket before putting the other back.
“Did you get my flowers?” he questioned.
“I did, but, Asher, flowers aren’t going to fix this,” I said quietly, fighting back tears as the memory of what he’d said came flooding back.
“I know that. I didn’t think they would. You were supposed to be home when I brought them to you.”
I had been home. I’d put my headphones in and hid in my bedroom, because when I’d heard his voice at the door, I knew I wasn’t ready to face him. I’d have crumbled, and that was something I had promised not only myself but Brielle I wouldn’t do.
He bent down and picked my basket up off the floor. Then he leaned into me and whispered, “Meet me in your car. I’ll take care of these.”
His breath tickled my neck, chills running through my body, and the scent of his cologne was enough to drive me mad. I nodded and turned, leaving the grocery store. No matter how much I wanted to push him away, I couldn’t. One look in his eyes was all it took.
As I walked to the car, I thought about the other two times I’d seen him this week. First out for a run Sunday morning in the park, then at The Cooling Rack when Brielle ripped him a new ass, which right after that I’d rushed home after seeing the pain in his eyes. I’d spent that night in tears, and now today.
I had been in the car about five minutes when Asher appeared, walking across the parking lot and opening my back door. He placed the bags in the back seat and climbed into the front passenger’s seat. He’d barely gotten the door closed when I turned to him.
“I swear to you, I didn’t lie about anything. It was all true. I was just afraid that if you found out you’d push me away.”
“I know,” he said.
“I swear, the diagnosis was real. I spent the last five years of my life living with that diagnosis over my head.”
“I know.”
“You aren’t the only one in shock here, you know. I had finally accepted it and had moved on. Then you happened, and now…this.”
“I know it all.”
I’d finally stopped for a moment and heard what Asher had said for the third time. I looked at him, while the words sunk into my head. “You know?” I questioned.
“I know. I know it all. After you left, I continued with my day. It was the only thing I could do. I had patients waiting. I also didn’t want to accept what it was I’d just found out. When I got home, the full magnitude of what had happened sent me into spiral I couldn’t control. I spent the night moping around the house, Saturday as well. When Sunday came, I left for my morning run and headed to the office to get my head back in the game. I literally let go of my last career, virtually giving up. I wasn’t about to do that with this one. As I was going through patient files, focusing on my upcoming week, I found yours.”
“And…”
“Don’t kill me. I shouldn’t have done it, I know, but I read it.”
“I see.”
“I quickly learned that Kavanaugh had diagnosed you as you said, but I also noticed his lack of testing. He’d not only done it to you, but I’ve found things in other client files that weren’t necessarily done correctly. Anyway, I read through it all, and I did it with a lump in my throat and pain in my chest as my heart crumbled once again into a million pieces. I’d made assumptions based on anger and shock. I want you to know I was wrong in doing that.”
“Yes, you were.”
Asher took a minute. “I was also wrong to treat you the way I did. I was shocked and upset that you didn’t feel comfortable enough to come to me. Most of all, as I read through everything, I realized what I’d thrown away was something I wanted, and I wanted it more than anything in my life.”
“What’s that?” I questioned.
Asher looked down at his hands, then looked back up at me and met my eyes. “You.”
A tear slid down my cheek, and I wanted to kick myself for allowing it to happen while he was sitting right here. I was supposed to be being strong, and instead I was unraveling.
