AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“You couldn’t have cared that much. You moved on pretty damn quick.” Jaxon grasped the top of the dining room chair across from me. His voice was firm, but I could hear the hurt behind it. “I slept with Heather just like I did any other random night. I needed something to distract me from how I was feeling. I so badly wanted to find you and finish what I had stopped.”
Jaxon stared down at the table, but when he lifted his head and his eyes met mine—I felt weak at the knees. “But because I didn’t, you found the one person I never wanted to be with you. If I knew by saying no, that you would end up with the shit version of me anyway . . . I would’ve done exactly what you wanted that night.”
I shook my head to get back into my dominant headspace. “You can’t be mad at me for doing what you chose for us. You can’t be upset with me for moving on after you told me nothing could happen. You weren’t just some guy to me that night Jaxon . . . I cared about you. Even if it was just as a friend or whatever we were at the time. But I would’ve rather had sex with you and had a reason to hate you instead of what we’ve been doing the past few months.”
Tomorrow, I would probably regret the next set of words that came out of my mouth. I took a deep breath and continued before I lost the stamina to say it. “I love you, Jaxon.”
I peered up to meet his gaze, frozen by the admission neither one of us expected to hear me say.
He let out a sound that was almost like a laugh. “Don’t give me that bullshit. You wanted a fling, and you ran into the very guy to give it to you the next night. Love me?” He pushed off the chair and wore a condescending smile. “Did you love me when you were fucking Bryson?”
I clenched my teeth to keep my jaw from dropping. The pull in my chest begged me to retreat from the man I no longer recognized in. It was as if he no longer cared that he hurt me, and I wasn’t sure if we would ever recover from this conversation.
He cocked his head, waiting for my response—his gaze now stoic and his face relaxed.
I had to get out of here. I refused to break down in front of him and demolish everything we had built since the first day we met. I crossed my arms to stop my hands from shaking and started toward the front door.
“Mace.” Jaxon’s voice was hoarse and more serious than before.
I didn’t turn around. All I wanted to do was walk outside and hit the restart button.
“Fuck, Maci, stop!” Jaxon snapped.
My hand gripped the handle, and I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. It caught me off guard to hear Jaxon this angry. The only sound in the entire place was his footsteps as he crossed the kitchen floor.
“I’m sorry,” he said, getting closer.
I turned my head to see him standing about a foot away from me.
“I shouldn't have said that and I’m sorry I snapped at you,” he offered softly. He took a few steps toward me like he was testing the waters.
I examined his face, liberated that the Jaxon I knew was back on the same planet as me. My body relaxed, and I faced him just as he closed the gap between us. He leaned his forehead against mine—a gesture he had done so many times before. But this time felt different, almost like he couldn’t accept the consequences of me walking away.
Heat radiated off of his bare chest and onto mine when he rested his forearms above my head. I was trapped, both of us half-naked and caught in the tension that had been brewing since I followed him here.
“What was that thing you said back there?” He smirked, and a small dimple appeared in his left cheek.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I teased, refusing to give in to the smile that so badly wanted to make an appearance. “I said so many things.”
He stared into my eyes and repeated the plea I gave him only a few moments ago. “I need you to say it.”
A pulse began in my upper thighs and made its way between my legs. Having him close like this ignited a fire in my stomach. My body ached to be against him, eager to give in to everything I had been withholding from it for five months.
“Bryson is my best friend,” Jaxon murmured. He skimmed his nose against mine, barely making contact at all.
My breath caught in my throat. I could put my mouth on his if I leaned into him just an inch or two.
The internal battle happening in my head was infuriating. The words hung on my lips, begging to release me from any doubts that formed in my mind. The man standing in front of me had held a special place in my heart since I sat next to him in class last semester.
Jaxon needed to hear me say the only phrase that, in his mind, would excuse him from going behind Bryson’s back.
“I love you,” I admitted, meaning every syllable as it drifted so effortlessly from the deepest parts of my chest.
He held my gaze for a moment and processed my confession. He grinned, licked the center of his bottom lip, and gently placed his mouth on mine. I put my hands on his chest and leaned into his kiss, exploring his mouth with my tongue. Warmth spread throughout my whole body as he cupped my face and trailed his fingers across my hip. I melted into his touch, fitting myself perfectly into the curve of his body.
Jaxon gave me a comfort I never felt with Bryson. I didn’t want it to stop—I wanted to feel him everywhere and give him permission to do everything that should have happened so much sooner than this moment.
He fisted his hand into the hair at the base of my neck, becoming more urgent with his mouth and quickening our pace. Just as I attempted to explore parts south of his waistband, he broke away to look at me.
