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I turned away, not wanting to talk about her.
“Lex… come on, look at me,” she cajoled. “She talks about you all the time, wonders when you’ll visit… I keep covering for you but I’m running out of excuses.”
“How can she want to see me? After what I did to her?”
“What did you do? You didn’t do anything. She made that choice.”
“Don’t act like she wasn’t forced into it. Someone had to take the fall, and she wouldn’t let it be me.” I still couldn’t meet Katya’s eyes.
“That’s because we needed you here. The Family needed you.”
“I needed her too.”
“Yeah, and that’s why you did what you did. Nobody blames you.”
Yippee ki-yay.Nobody blames me for killing my father and letting my mother take the fall.
I pursed my lips and sipped my coffee, unable to find words for my own self-loathing.
“I could’ve planned it better,” I said, my voice low. I still had trouble getting words out when it came to this. “I could’ve made it look like an accident instead of losing my temper like a lil’ bitch and smashing his head with a brick.”
“You can’t blame yourself. He provoked you.”
I remained quiet and Katya sighed, looking at me with something like pity in her eyes. I turned away from her, not wanting to see it. “In any case,” she said, “she sent you some gifts.”
I cocked an eyebrow. “Oh?”
“Yes.” Katya held out a card to me. I frowned in confusion as I took it. “Zlata Bogdanov.She has an operation out of Kyiv. Runs drugs from Afghanistan. She’s waiting for your call.”
I felt tears prick my eyes.
My mother had found me a new connect.
CHAPTERFIFTEEN
NORA
I’ll admit, I didn’t really think this plan through. Working till late at Pandemonium and then having an early morning shift at the hospital meant that sleeping was going to be an alien concept for a while. I got home, dragging my feet, feeling used and demoralized to find my grandmother waiting up for me.
Great.
My lipstick was smudged. I was afraid I still had glitter on my body. I just wanted to shower and maybe take a nap. Lita had other ideas.
“Where have you been?” she asked in that quiet yet disappointed voice that never failed to make me feel about two feet tall.
“I…” I cleared my throat. “I went out with my friends.”
She gave me a huge side-eye. “In your sweatpants?”
I shrugged. “Why not?”
She just looked at me and sighed. I hated lying to her, but the truth was not an option.
“Lita, I’m tired and I gotta work in a few hours. Can we talk tomorrow?”
“When exactly would we talk? You are never home.”
I saw red at this bit of exaggeration. “Never,Grandma? Really?”
