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A few people made disgruntled sounds, but the door slid closed before anyone could argue. He rubbed my arm while we ascended and stayed silent, like he knew I wasn’t going to be able to have a conversation right now.
All I kept thinking about was Alan’s arm around that woman. He never did anything like that with me. He said he didn’t like public displays of affection, but now I knew better. He didn’t want to be seen with me. He didn’t want people to know he was dating the boring, fat girl. Shame ate at my insides and my hands shook so hard that I almost dropped Mr Andrews’s lunch.
“Just hold on, sweetheart. We’re almost there.”
I couldn’t see past the tears blurring my vision, so when the doors slid open and Luka guided me out, I had no other option but to follow his lead.
“Julie? What’s wrong?”
Bennett’s voice drifted over me, but I couldn’t make myself look up. My eyes burned from my poor attempt at holding back the tears and a few dislodged anyway, slipping down my cheeks.
“We’ll talk about it in a minute. Just come with us,” Luka growled, dragging me forward. He didn’t stop until I was settled on a couch. He plucked the tray from my hands, handing it off before dropping to his knees in front of me. He cupped my cheeks, forcing me to look at him. “You’re okay, Julie.”
My chin trembled, and I broke down, my shoulders shaking on suppressed sobs. I didn’t feel okay. I felt… ugly, unwanted, embarrassed. The break up played through my head, the truth only emphasized by the woman Alan chose to move on with. She was everything I wasn’t. Thin and gorgeous, probably with a better job and not an ounce of self consciousness. She probably didn’t have an addiction to greasy Chinese food and no doubt she was interesting and entertaining and probably a gymnast in bed. I bit my lip, trying to hold in the tears that wouldn’t stop spilling over my face.
“What happened?”
Mr Andrews’s voice was rough, and I felt a flush work its way up my neck. I didn’t realize Luka would bring me to Mr Andrews’s office. Now even my boss could witness another breakdown. He was going to start reconsidering my position since I couldn't stop embarrassing him in public.
“She ran into her ex in the cafeteria. Froze like a deer in headlights. It’s okay, Julie. Just breathe.”
Someone handed me a box of tissues and I wiped my face roughly, not putting any effort into sparing my makeup. What did it matter? It wasn’t like it was helping, anyway.
“Why the hell was she down there?” Mr Andrews snarled.
“Getting your lunch. She said she wanted to get back into her routine.”
Mr Andrews made an irritated noise before coming to sit beside me and taking my hand. His free hand rubbed small circles on my back. “I don’t need you to do that, Julie. I’m perfectly capable of getting my own lunch.”
“I-I’m s-sorry! I just wanted to help! I didn’t w-want to embarrass you!”
The words were choked out between sobs. I felt so stupid.
“Julie, you didn’t embarrass me. Don’t–” He let out a frustrated sound before I felt his arms come around me. He hugged me tightly against his chest, so tightly in fact that it was a little hard to breathe. And it was exactly what I needed. I clung to him, my face buried against him, as he squeezed me. Another body covered my back, and the embrace grew warmer. And then finally, Bennett wrapped his arms around all three of us, completing the group hug.
I choked out a laugh at the situation, but not one part of me wanted them to pull away. Wrapped in their arms, I felt warm and safe and cared for. I wanted to stay here forever.
Slowly, my breathing steadied, and the hiccuping sobs dissipated. Once I let out a shuddering sigh, the guys slowly released me one by one until I was sitting on my own again. Mr Andrews handed me a bottle of water and Bennett offered me another tissue while Luka stroked my hair. I forced out a small smile.
“Thank you. I needed that. I’m sorry for–”
“Nothing. You’ve got no reason to be sorry,” Luka scowled.
I grimaced. “Yes, but–”
“But nothing. You shouldn’t feel an ounce of guilt. You saw your ex with another woman like a month after you broke up. It’d gut anyone. You’re allowed to have feelings about that. If I wasn’t focused on you, I would’ve knocked his ass out.”
Mr Andrews made an irritated noise. “Shut up and let her speak, Luka.”
Bennett ignored them both, kneeling in front of me and tucking my hair behind my ear. “You okay?”
I lifted a shoulder. The hug helped, but I still felt raw and overwhelmed. I was afraid if I let my mind wander that I’d spiral again. It was hard not to when faced with Alan and the woman he preferred over me.
“That asshole is an idiot. He’s seeing Khloe? She’s got red flags the size of Texas.”
When I glanced at Luka, he was shaking his head, a look of disgust on his face. He glanced at me and raised his eyebrows. “I mean it. I’ve seen her around. She cares more about her image than anything real. You don’t have to worry about her, Julie. She’s got no substance. She’s got nothing on you.”
He was saying everything I wanted to hear and I still couldn’t make myself believe him. I shook my head.
