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“I do not think this is enough, but I thought to bring it back so it can begin cooking while I hunt for more,” I declare, taking in the sight of Kai sitting close to Weyland without a trace of fear in her eyes. There are small tear tracks on her cheeks, but they don’t appear to be from outward pain. They must have talked and something touched myamartadeeply.
For that alone, the lycan is an asset.
I know he would rather rip out his own heart than hurt her. After all, I feel the same way.
Kai has slowly started to open up and be less afraid. Her fear has faded away when it comes to us, and something inside of me wants to probe deeper even though I won’t. Everything must come from Kai. Weyland and I are in agreement. We’ll move ather pace, and we’ll follow her wherever she goes, even into her own darkness.
“Don’t bother,” Weyland says with a grin. “I deserve a chance to earn my pride back. I’ll go capture something else to add to the meal. You start the fire so Kai is not so hungry by the time I return.”
I watch as the lycan smiles gently at Kai, which she returns with a soft grin, before he bounds off into the forest, hunting for another source of food. I don’t know how long it will take him, but I suspect it won’t be as long as it took me. Surely, wolves are better hunters than a . . . whatever I am. I’m formidable in the water, but in these woods? They are more his hunting grounds than mine.
I hold up the creature in hopes of impressing her anyway. “Lopes are much like rabbits, but they are a little tastier if you ask me. I found some leaves that are good for spices that should give it more flavor.”
Kai leans up to rest her arms around her knees as her eyes soften. “It sounds lovely. Would you like me to help you build the fire?”
“Absolutely not. You remain there, and I shall build one for you,” I reply. My mate will want for nothing.
Mate…the word came naturally.
It feels right and warmth blooms in me as I repeat it in my head, even if she never hears it.
She sits in her spot, watching as I move around, collecting wood. It doesn’t take me long to get the fire going, the flames crackling as it reaches the correct temperature. Once I have the meat roasting over the fire, I take a seat next to Kai. I make sure to give her ample space, but after a few beats of silence, she moves a little closer, her eyes dancing to me and then away.
Our Kai is still shy, but she isn’t afraid.
It eases something in my heart to know that she no longer fears us. It’s progress, even if she doesn’t realize it, and with that small show of strength from my mate, I want to bellow in victory but I restrain myself.
“It smells so good,” Kai murmurs, her eyes reflecting the flames in a way that makes me want to move closer and hold her, but I resist. I want her to reach for me, and it’s still too soon for such things. Kai is still healing, and if she never reaches out, then I will be okay with that. My only hope is that we can show her that life is worth living.
“The leaves are something I’ve only seen in the Dead Lands. Most monsters leave them be, but those of us with a certain palate utilize them. I find my taste buds hunger for more of the human flavors I used to smell while in the Gilded Lands, but I can manage with anything.”
She hums under her breath, her arms still wrapped around her knees for warmth. Kai has started to put on healthy weight since staying with me. It was clear when I saved her that she was malnourished. Perhaps it could have simply been a lack of food in the Shadow Lands, but I don’t believe so. Kai’s shape is naturally curvy and her bones had been sticking out before. Now, she appears more sound—at least on the outside. It’s the scars and pain on the inside that will take far longer to mend.
“You know,” I begin, focusing on the fire so as to not scare her with my intensity. I can still see her from the corner of my eye, and I keep a careful watch on her reaction as I speak. “I saw you . . . when you fell.”
She flinches, but when I glance to see if it’s too much, I find that she’s watching me carefully. She doesn’t say a word, but her eyes tell me to continue.
“I was in the river below the castle. I was often there because some intrinsic part of me brought me back time and time again. Perhaps it was because part of me yearned for the human sideof me to make a difference. Now, I think something pulled me there so often in order for me to see you.” I sigh. “At first, I considered not moving. I watched you plummet from the top, but before you were halfway down, I was already swimming. I did not consciously make the choice to save you, but something urged me to save you nonetheless.”
“I had no intention of being saved that day,” she whispers, and the pain in her words makes my chest ache.
The idea of a world without my Kai? Unthinkable. Even now, I nearly shudder in horror at almost being too late.
“I know that now,” I reply, glancing at her. “But then, I only knew you needed me, and so I was there.” I turn the meat over the fire, making sure it’s evenly roasted before continuing and meeting her eyes. “I know now that you jumped, but when I look into your eyes, I see a spark there that makes me want to climb up to the top of that castle with you. It makes me want to wrap you in my arms and be your reason to live. That feeling is so thick, it almost chokes me sometimes, and I want to destroy whatever hurt you.”
She blinks, and I startle when I realize I’ve made her cry. Guilt eats at me, but when I open my mouth to apologize, she holds up her hand.
“Don’t apologize,” she rasps. “Your honesty moves me.”
“I did not mean to make you cry.” I grimace. “A beautiful creature like you should not be brought to tears.”
“They are not sad tears,” she admits. “I just . . . never expected to meet someone like you and Weyland. I thought I knew everything about this world I needed to, but I was wrong. I don’t know what that means yet. I can’t understand the inner workings of my mind still, but . . . I appreciate what you’ve done for me and what you continue to do for me.”
Those words nearly knock me over, and hope blooms in my chest so fiercely, I have to swallow to keep it down. It’s progress,but I can’t push her too soon. Instead of shouting at her admission, I offer her my hand. When she slips hers into mine without hesitation, the buzz under my skin settles.
If given that chance, if Kai decides that this world is too much for her, then perhaps she will not be leaping alone the second time. Perhaps our lives are so intertwined that whatever existence she chooses, I will choose too.
When Weyland reappears with another lope and a large, happy grin, both of us smile at the lycan. Some part of this, though I’ve never had it before, feels a little bit like home.
