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I nodded. “Now that’s an answer I can appreciate.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m not afraid to try anything once,” I told her. “If that means going for a second round or following a feeling or chasing love, then I’m up for it.”
“Have you been in a relationship before?”
“Not one that was heavy enough to discuss.”
“Let me see if I have this right ... In the short time you’ve known me, things are already different than anything you’ve experienced before, they’re deeper, and that’s why you’re interested in a second round?”
I left the window and went over to my bed, where I flopped down and adjusted the pillows to mold around my neck. “Yes. Much different. And already much deeper.” I rubbed my hand over the top of my head, stopping to ask, “Does that surprise you? Because I get the sense this isn’t one-sided—you feel it too.”
“Surprise, yes.” She paused. “I went into this needing to unplug, escape, and I had this burning desire to learn more about men. You could call it a focus group of sorts, giving me a moment to breathe from my life while scoring myself some rock star sex. I surely didn’t see this happening.”
“What do you want in a man that you’ve never been able to have before?”
She took several seconds to respond. “Trust. Monogamy. Love.” She idled and I could tell she wasn’t done speaking. “I’ve looked for it, and apparently, I’ve searched in all the wrong places. But if I’m being honest, even if those three things slapped me in the face right now, I don’t know if I’d feel it. This moment, this present period of time—it’s a hard one.”
I understood that. Although I hadn’t lost anyone close to me, this new stage of life wasn’t easy to navigate. Still, I was intrigued by the three elements that meant the most to her.
Things that, after our evening together, seemed almost too easy to achieve.
I wondered what that meant.
For us.
For a future.
If I could really be the man who could constantly make her smile.
A smile I was dying to see, but I wouldn’t ask for a picture or even a video.
When I saw that smile again, I wanted it to be in person, without any lace covering her face.
I focused on the desk across from my bed, the stack of books piled on top, knowing I had a paper to write for tomorrow and an exam to study for and at least eight more hours of Hooked work ahead of me before I would be getting any sleep.
But if Love told me she was available, I would meet her.
“Can I tell you something I’ve never said to anyone before?”
“Yes,” she said.
“You’re already changing me.”
CHAPTER SIX
“Look who wants more,” I said as I held the phone to my ear, answering Love’s call through the app.
There was a slight giggle, and then: “Guilty. I want to hang. Are you free tonight?”
Free.
Something I wished for more than anything right now, especially after our last conversation and after she’d taken the initiative to reach out less than forty-eight hours later, when she’d told me she was busy the whole week.
“You’re not going to believe this,” I told her, “but I’m actually on a last-minute trip to Manhattan.”
“Fun! What are you doing there?”
