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Pain shoots up from my knees, but it pales to that of my heart right now.
Dropping my face in my hands, I sob, scream and cry for everything I both found and lost in that house.
“Alana.”
Images of our time together flicker through my mind like a movie.
Already, none of it seems real.
Maybe all of that was the dream.
It was too good to be true.
Finding the connection with each of them… It was incredible.
Mav and I discovering what married life should be like for us.
Listening to JD open up about his issues and being there for him when it all got too much.
And Reid…
Finally breaking down his walls and getting to see the real man who hides behind the hard exterior was more than I could ever imagine.
And now it’s gone.
All of it.
All of them.
“Alana.”
Warmth covers my face. I try to break away from it, but I’m not strong enough.
I’m weak. Broken. And in a totally different way than before.
Then, I was just fucked up. Now, I’m totally fucking broken.
“ALANA.” The sound of my name being shouted breaks through the white noise of despair before a cutting pain slices across my face.
My head whips to the side as shock rocks through me.
Opening my watery eyes, I find Aubrey on her knees before me, staring at me as if I’ve got four heads.
“Y-you s-slapped me,” I whisper, unable to come up with another reason for the burning pain that’s heating up my cheek.
“Sorry,” she mutters, not sounding all that sorry about it. “You need to calm down.”
My eyes widen in shock.
“Calm down,” I whisper before pushing to my feet again, suddenly finding a surge of strength from her bullshit comment. “Calm fucking down?” I echo.
Ripping my eyes from her, I stare at the house again. The entire thing is engulfed in flames. Anything we had inside is ruined. Gone.
“How? How can I calm down? Look. My entire fucking world was in that house.”
My sobs come again. Whole body-wracking sobs that make my chest hurt in the most horrific way.
“Have you got a gun?” I suddenly blurt.
