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“You know. About last night. I mean…it wasn’t exactly…you know. It’s not how I planned…what I wanted and I’m sure it’s not what you wanted either and—”
“Sit.” He motioned to the chair in front of his desk.
“No. I shouldn’t.” She edged backward a little. “You said you were busy.”
“I am but I’m not going to get anything done with you yammering in the doorway.”
“Right. Sorry. I can go.” But she didn’t move. “I just thought we should—”
“Talk. You said that.”
“Yeah, I did.” She stared at her hands. “But maybe we shouldn’t.”
“You don’t want to talk?” That was a first.
“We can…but I thought we could…you know.” She shrugged one shoulder, her eyes glancing to his and then away.
“I’m afraid I don’t.” He had no idea what she was talking about but that wasn’t unusual.
“I thought we could…you know.” She stressed the last two words.
“I really don’t.”
“Have sex,” she whispered.
“Now?” After she’d laughed at him and tried to kill him by shoving his nose through his brain…twice.
“Yeah. I want to apologize for last night. I didn’t mean to lau—”
“Stop.”
“But I want to apologize.”
“You don’t need to say it. I heard enough about it last night.”
“From who? Where did you go?” Her meekness disappeared fast as she stepped into the room. “Why didn’t you come to bed? I left the light on for you and I was worried when I woke.”
“You had no reason to be. I’ve been taking care of myself for years.”
“Yeah, but it was your…our wedding night.”
“If you were so worried about that maybe you shouldn’t have drunk yourself into a stupor.”
“I was nervous.”
“About what?” His temper rose like a volcano.
“About us. The marriage. Sex.”
“Oh, so suddenly you’re a virgin again?”
“No but we’ve never had sex.”
“You have to get plastered before your first time with every man or am I special?” He knew the answer to that and wished he hadn’t asked.
“It’s not…I never…”
“Yes, I’m quite aware that you don’t think of me as a man.” There he’d said it. It shouldn’t hurt so much once it was out in the open–again–but it did. It ripped into him like the words had teeth.
