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I slumped back into my chair, a new gush of anxiety spreading through my body. I picked up my phone and texted Alison, hoping she could find me a way out of this.
Me: Your father just cornered me into going to the party on Saturday.
Me: Get me out of it, please.
Alison: Welcome to my life. Adrian Dornier is a persuasive man when he wants something. But I’ll be there with you.
Me: Please tell me your brother isn’t going.
Alison: Will a lie make you feel better right now?
Me: No.
Alison: I’ll be there. You’ll focus on me and block out the rest. Okay?
She was typing another message when my eyes sensed something moving and glanced up from my phone. Liam was coming out of his office, stopping at the door as his eyes landed on mine. I swallowed dryly and averted my gaze, but it was too late. His beautiful features had burned a new hole through my chest.
He looked damn good, and somehow that hurt like a bitch.
I, on the other hand, was a horrible mess. My eyes had dark circles around them as a permanent fixture now, contrasting with my pale face and red, puffy nose. Crying every day took a massive toll on my body when all I wanted was to look as unaffected as he did.
I stared back at those three dancing dots, signaling Alison was still typing, trying my best not to break before I had the chance to hide in the bathroom.
“How are you, Miss Harden?” That voice that sounded like a damn sonnet rang in my ears, a treacherous shiver running down my spine.
Fuck I missed him.
Snap out of it, Jamie.
“I’m fine, Sir. Thank you.” I coldly replied, my eyes still glued to my phone, gaining courage before I looked back up at him. It was clear there was something more he wanted to say, but instead, he pursed his lips as he took in the unshed tears brimming in my eyes. Liam inhaled deeply while his hands balled into fists, and that strong jaw pumped in pulses.
My breath was stuck in my lungs, and my eyes didn’t dare to blink. I knew those tears would fall as soon as they did, so I focused on his green eyes, staring at him as if I wasn’t crumbling inside.
Liam stayed silent, watching me back, thinking God knows what about my blotchy face. When I refocused on my phone as if it was more important than him, he simply walked away, crushing whatever progress I had made these last five weeks with a damn question, a tailored suit, and those green eyes filled with pity.
I hated him. I hated him so much it fucking hurt. When? When was it going to stop?
Chapter 33
Jamie
Recurrent nightmares broke me back down when I thought I was finally pulling myself out of the mud, smashing all my progress to smithereens.
I had some peaceful nights, but they were still greatly outnumbered by the devastating ones.
I would dream of him in those last ones. Liam would come to my apartment, make love to me, speak words of his undying devotion to me before we fell asleep in each other’s arms.
That was the tempting dream until it was suddenly twisted into a sick nightmare. I would wake up and see him lying there naked, in my own bed, with another woman in his arms, their legs laced together. Liam stroked her hair and kissed her head, loving her as he had just done with me. I tried to pry and see her face, but I never could.
Liam treated her like a queen. Like a precious possession. Like the damn love of his life.
I love you! I heard him whisper into her ear.
Every night this dream haunted me. I’d wake up crying, suffocating on my own gasps and sobs. I’d stay awake, counting every minute and hour until the sun rose, as I tried my best to numb back the pain into some kind of submission.
If I didn’t know any better, I could swear he had been in my room, his scent lingering everywhere, and instead of fading a little every night, it only got stronger. But Liam had taken my request to heart. I didn’t even have to change the lock because he never came back.
As pathetic as it was, some nights I wished he would come, say he was sorry, make love to me and kiss the pain away. Those thoughts were damaging, but they were like a plague. They didn’t ask for permission to exist. They simply did.
