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Leif
Walking around looking at trees with Flora was thoroughly enjoyable. Leif had offered his hand and she’d taken it and he liked how her hand felt in his, small, dainty and feminine. She was a beautiful woman but there was so much more to her than that. She was intelligent, articulate, compassionate, sweet and kind. He felt comfortable with her and that was something he’d never experienced before. Flora was a woman he could be himself with, a woman he felt no need to put on an act with and it was refreshing. He’d often felt judged by women in the past but with Flora he never felt that way. Of course, he was still getting to know her, but he did feel a connection with her and that was new to him. It made him question his reluctance to ever become deeply involved with anyone because never before had he liked a woman this much — and they hadn’t so much as kissed. Perhaps that was where he’d gone wrong in the past because he hadn’t got to know the women he’d dated as friends first and so their time together had been brief and based on physical attraction and nothing else.
‘What about this tree?’ Flora asked.
‘What is it?’ He peered at the label attached to the trunk. ‘A blue spruce.’
She sniffed the tree. ‘It does have a good scent and would make Victor’s house smell lovely and festive.’
‘I agree. And the silver-blue foliage is striking.’
‘That’s settled then.’ Flora smiled up at him. ‘The decorations I bought for him will go nicely on the tree along with the lights you got.’
‘I hope so.’ He smiled at her, suppressing the urge to stroke her cheek. ‘Do you want to get a drink or something to eat?’ There were food stalls at the tree farm and the aromas of hot dogs and onions, of crepes and mulled wine were mouth-watering.
‘I could drink something but it’s probably better not to eat as Victor is sorting us food.’
‘Of course he is.’ Leif nodded. ‘Fancy a mulled wine then?’
‘I’d love one.’
‘We can get a drink then pick up the tree on our way back,’ he said, leading the way to the refreshment stalls.
When they had cups of mulled wine, they walked over to a barrel table that had two hay bales either side of it as seats. Leif had got a sausage for Magnus and he placed it on the barrel while he sat down. Magnus stared hard at the sausage as if worried that it would roll away if he averted his gaze for a second. Flora sat opposite Leif, her wine cradled between her gloved palms.
‘So what’s your job like?’ he asked. He knew that Flora had a tender and compassionate side, that she’d lost her mum young and to such a terribly sad condition, but he also knew that she worked hard. She was fragile yet tough, strong and resilient.
‘I love my job,’ she said, a smile playing on her lips. ‘It’s hard and there’s no room to sit on my laurels but it’s good. It keeps me focused and it pays well too.’ She laughed.
‘The people I work with want me to tend to their trees, to help sort out their gardens and green spaces, so I spend most of mytime outdoors which I love. But you work hard in the city and the world of business. I’m guessing it’s very different.’
‘It is very different.’ She inclined her head. ‘As a senior recruitment consultant, I match people to permanent jobs. The agency I work for is international and very well-known so we get a lot of businesses and jobseekers coming to us. It’s a career where I need to build strong relationships with companies and job seekers so I can make the right matches. In a day I can do a range of tasks from headhunting, drafting job adverts, meeting with companies and job seekers as well as interviewing the latter. I also advise employers and employees about salaries and job roles as well as long-term planning.’
‘Wow!’ He nodded. ‘What a lot of skills you have.’
‘All the better to find people jobs, my dear!’ she said with a laugh. ‘I love how busy and intense it is. I’ve always been driven though.’ She sighed. ‘I think that growing up without my mum, knowing what she went through made me this way. I have to prove myself.’
‘It sounds like you’ve already done that,’ he said gently. ‘You’ve proved yourself to yourself, if that makes sense. And you don’t have to prove anything to anyone else. You’re the one who matters.’
‘It’s hard because my mum was obviously concerned that she wasn’t the perfect version of herself that she thought people needed her to be. She was ill, I know that, and it breaks my heart to think of how she must have suffered over the years. Her mother and grandmother damaged her confidence and left her struggling emotionally. I never wanted to end up punishing myself like that and so I’ve thrown myself into my career, reminded myself that I am so much more than my appearance. Of course, though… it was hard not to question my desirability when my ex did what he did.’
‘What did he do?’ Leif watched her carefully, not sure if he should have asked but wanting her to feel that she could talk to him about it. She’d clearly been badly hurt.
‘It’s complicated.’ She rubbed at her brow beneath her fringe. ‘Well, actually, it’s not. He cheated on me with my best friend.’
‘I’m so sorry.’ Leif shook his head. ‘A double betrayal.’
‘It was awful. Knowing that the two people who should have had my back were actuallydoing thingsbehind my back hurt so badly. But I also felt like an idiot because there were signs and I chose to ignore them. I didn’t want to believe that it could be true. I cared about them both so much.’
‘You’re not the idiot, they are idiots. You can’t blame yourself for their poor behaviour. You can’t control what other people do or choose to think or feel. They both betrayed you and that’s bad but it’s all on them.’
Flora shrugged then took a sip of her wine. ‘I’ve asked myself so many times if I could have been better in some way. A better friend. A better girlfriend. Better looking. Thinner.’ She bit her bottom lip. ‘And then I realise that I’m spiralling and it’s dangerous and I don’t want to go down that path, so I take a deep breath and pull myself together again. It’s not easy because I felt so deceived and deeply hurt but I don’t want to end up like my mum.’
‘Of course not, Flora, you have so much to live for. You’re an amazing person and you deserve to be surrounded with people who care about you.’
‘Thanks, Leif, you’re so kind.’
‘I find it hard to understand why any man would choose to hurt you or choose another woman over you. I’m aware that we don’t know each other that well but I’m a big believer in first impressions and you are simply wonderful. You have such a kind heart and I’m a good judge of character, so I know that you’regenuine. You didn’t deserve to be cheated on. Your ex and your friend were fools.’
