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—I know, now let's go, it's time to say goodbye.
We both leave my room, one of the escorts takes our suitcases so we can put them on the van that will take us to the airport where a plane will be waiting for us. When we reach the main hall the four brothers remain standing.
—They will go on a common trip, it is easier to make them mix and not follow their trail —Domenico informs—. On a private plane it is easier to track movements, the jet and many other things. The most likely thing is that they will be gone for at least three weeks, during which time we will be in charge of finding those two.
—We will leave Alessio loose so that you can return and make the final attack, until then, you two will be in Nevada, United States, you already have a house for yourselves, security and Francisco along with Tamara will be with you, they came forward to be able to organize the “escort,” Salvatore adds without looking at me for long, his gaze passing from one point to another without holding each other. When they arrive we will be contacting them with disposable cell phones and we will set hours so that the network is not interfered with either by the Alessio hackers that may be at their disposal.
—Okay, thanks for the protection.
David says, the three brothers take him away, leaving me alone in front of the main entrance with Salvatore. I tense as I stand next to him, he releases his shoulders that were too rigid and looks at me for the first time.
—I'm sorry things are like this, it's not what you want me to do and I understand it, however, it's the best for both of us to come back alive after finishing all this.
—Salvatore, there is a possibility that you will die here, I understand that you want to take me away so that they don't catch me, kill me before your eyes and you are left without the opportunity to create something for the future. However, I think you should think about me and yourself a little more deeply.
-What do you mean?
—That you only think about yourself, you don't want me to die because of your enemies and that is why you send me away believing that this will prevent my death, but who prevents yours? —I ask inquisitively, right now I have a lot of emotions on the surface and it is not good since I don't think much about what I say—. You don't think about the fact that I don't want to lose you either, I don't want you to die and that's why it bothers me because here you think you're safe. Maybe staying together, pushing our ideas and supporting each other is the best, but you don't see it that way. You only think that the dead person will end up being me being in this country, when you can also die Salvatore. And you don't think about that, think about what I want.
I bite the inside of my cheek when I finish speaking, he massages his chin and finds it difficult to look me directly in the eyes as he has done many other times without obstacles or obstacles.
"I want you to understand that walking away doesn't mean that I don't love you or think about you, I do," he emphasizes. However, due to the training you have, we are not going to be able to advance all of us hoping that as a group we kill two bastards who could get out of hand when I confront them. I know them, you don't, they, seeing you in Apulia leading and being the lady of the mafia, I assure you that the one who will care the least is me, because although it may sound selfish, this war has always been about me.
» I have always been the one with the problem, the one they want to kill starting by doing damage that I will not be able to endure. They know that by killing you they have assured my downfall, they will only have to visit me at home to finish cutting my neck and that way the Rinaldis will end up reigning in both areas. It's not about killing everyone without looking, it's about the strategies of both sides and for years I have defined how they move. They're not going to kill me, they're going to look for you, they're going to want to find you so they can kill you, deliver you dead into my arms, and fuck me that way. By doing that I leave my brothers exposed, it would be easier for them, because me falling means that my brothers are going to have to hold on so they don't get killed because I won't be able to continue. They're not going to kill me until they kill you, Emily, is it that hard to understand?
I step back when he is about to take my arms, I detail the ribbon wrapping his wrist and I remember my promise, I remember everything even though there is an emptiness inside me that I am not paying attention to because I only see ways to stay with him.
—Emily .
—I don't want to lose you, I want to stay.
—You can't, you have to go.
Everything attacks my head strongly, which means that I don't have control of my thoughts and my language. Everything explodes because I just want him to accept that I can stay, that I want to, I don't want to leave for some reason. I feel like my head is screaming for me to beg him, to do it because if I leave the country there will be no return for me and I don't know why.
I don't know where all these thoughts wrapped in doubts, these negative ideas and even this doubt about what we have come from. I feel like something won't let me come back, I feel like something will divide us.
-Please.
I beg once again letting the tears flow down my face.
I just broke off all relationships with my father, I just lost my mother and on top of that I have to get away from him who has always made me feel safe in his arms. Maybe he wasn't as strong as I thought, maybe I'm also depending on him and everything he can offer me.
Or maybe I just want to cry, I want to fix my problems that have been so stored in my soul and in my head that I realize I can't do it because right now the situation is one of life or death; However, my head does not want to understand it that way.
"If you don't go on your own, I'll be the one to put you on that plane," he warns coldly. I don't want you here. I want you to go.
I run my hand over my cheeks.
"Well, don't pretend to believe I'm coming back," I say, annoyed. I can't convince him, I can't make him see that I need him because only with him am I able to let my demons flow and be controlled. Because I won't come back, don't go looking for me anymore, I'll stay wherever I go.
—Emily, don't take it...
“Goodbye Salvatore,” I head to the door, his hand hitting my wrist where our ribbon of trust wraps around my skin. It was nice while it lasted.
—Emily.
I break free, untie the knot on my wrist and drop the blue ribbon on the ground to run away. When I see that Cookie Ginevra is not there, she comes to me, takes my arm and kisses my cheek to open the truck door for me.
