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“I do love adventure,” he admits. “Which is why we’re going to have fun on this treasure hunt. I think you want some thrills of your own. You’re trying to hide it, but the more I look into your eyes, the more I see how much you want it.”
“Maybe I do want to do something I haven’t done before,” I say almost defiantly. “That doesn’t mean I don’t love what I do, or love my day-to-day life.”
“So you’ve come to me for adventure?”
“Youcame tome.”
“Butyouchose to stay.” It’s said with such intensity I’m glued to my seat. The waiter sets down the bread, salads, and mushrooms before quickly disappearing again. The interruption gives me a moment to compose myself.
“I did choose to stay, Blaze, because I’m intrigued. It has everything to do with a fun adventure, and nothing to do with wanting to spend time with you.” I’m trying to build a wall between us. After our weekend at the resort I have to or we’re going to fall right back where we were ten years ago, and this time I’m not sure my heart can take the breakup.
Pushing away my nerves, I lift my fork, force myself to spear some lettuce and tomato, and take a bite. I’m sure it tastes delicious, but I can barely chew and swallow, let alone enjoy it.
“You’re protesting a lot,” Blaze says, his posture lazy, his eyes crinkled as he smiles before taking a bite of his food and sighing. “I’ve always enjoyed a great meal.”
His comment makes me look down his chest to his flat stomach. The man can eat whatever he wants, but he’s so damn active he’s unbelievably beautiful. I hate that every single thing he says makes me think of the two of us naked.
“I came here to hunt for treasure. That’s all. Don’t try to read more into it,” I warn.
For the first time this evening, Blaze’s eyes narrow and he’s trying to control a brewing temper. He leans forward. I know I should retreat but I’m glued to the spot, unable to do a thing about it.
“You don’t have to fight it, Cori.” His temper evaporates as quickly as it rose.
“I’m not a complicated person, Blaze. I do things by the book, and I don’t stray.”
“You allowed yourself to let go ten years ago,” he points out. “And you were letting go pretty damn good this past weekend.”
“Ten years ago was a different lifetime.” I don’t comment about the past weekend. “Don’t try to find that girl. She’s long gone.”
“There are people who sit on the sidelines and those who won’t allow life to pass them by. I choose to live my life by not staying on the sidelines, watching it pass by. We may have spent only one summer together, but I saw the adventure inside you, and I know it’s still there. Don’t run and hide, Cori.”
Surprisingly, I start smiling. “Is that a speech you practice?” Maybe it’s the champagne, or maybe he’s simply wearing me down. I’m not sure which it is, but the tenseness fades. I’m enjoying our sparring.
“I don’t need to practice, darling; I’m utter perfection,” he cockily tells me.
“Well then, let the adventures begin.” I see the happy surprise in his eyes and am glad I decided to let go a bit. I find the longer I’m with him, the more I want to let my guard down. It might be dangerous, but isn’t the most fun when we do let down our defenses? Probably. That’s always been incredibly hard for me though.
“Good. If you don’t allow yourself to let go once in a while, you’ll wake up one day realizing you never had a chance to live.”
“I’ve lived. Just because my way of life might not suit everyone doesn’t mean it’s wrong.”
“Would it have made a difference ten years ago if I came to you, stole you away to some remote island, and held you captive?”
I grip my glass so tightly I’m shocked it doesn’t shatter. I can’t look away from the intensity of his eyes as he waits for me to answer. I want to tell him it wouldn’t have made a difference but I’m not sure. I definitely don’t want to tell him that.
“It doesn’t matter because it didn’t happen, and I don’t believe in wishing or thinking of what could have been. That’s useless emotion.”
“Maybe. But sometimes if you don’t think of the past or the future, the present doesn’t matter.”
He puts all of these thoughts I don’t want in my head. I picture my body sliding perfectly against his. I imagine him kissing his way down my shoulders, cupping my breasts, whispering into my ears, causing shudders to roll through me.
The fire in Blaze’s eyes leaves me with no doubt: He knows what I’m thinking. He said he wants to play a game — and it’s a game I’m losing. But I have to make it through the meal. Maybe my body’s a quivering mass, and maybe I’m a bit stuck in the past, but I’m surviving. I have to celebrate small victories.
Our main course is delivered, and Blaze lightens up. I sip more champagne and we talk about what we might find in the game. It eases my nerves. It feels like only the blink of an eye when the waiter brings out coffee with dessert and I gratefully sip it, needing to clear my head as Blaze goes abnormally quiet.
“We have a long day tomorrow, Blaze. I think we should call this a night.” He smiles at me, his secret smile that makes me want to demand to know what’s going through his mind. But I won’t ask. When he rises, I try to do the same, but my knees are shaking. He leans over and I tell myself to breathe.
“Get plenty of rest, Cori. Tomorrow will be a long day.” His voice is soft as his breath caresses my face.
