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“Not true. You were brooding. Don’t get me wrong. It was hot. Sexy even, but the polar opposite of the man I knew you to be.”
“And now? Who am I now?” I’m almost afraid to ask, but she’s not wrong. I tend to be over the top at the office, and although I never thought about it until she mentioned it, I do tend to be different things to different people. That’s normal, though, right?
“Complex,” she says, resting her hand against my cheek.
I place my hand over her wrist and turn my head, pressing my lips in the palm of her hand. “I was married,” I blurt. She doesn’t say anything. Her eyes are trained on mine as she lets me process my thoughts. “It was good, or at least I thought so until it all came crashing down around me.” Her thumb smooths a line under my eye. “Our marriage wasn’t perfect. She hated the lake, and pretty much everything else I enjoyed, but I loved her. I once thought that love was all you needed.”
“What happened?” she asks softly.
“She complained that I worked too much. It was a constant battle with us, but I had just taken over the reins as CEO, and I thought I had something to prove. To myself, you know? I always knew it would be me who took over for Dad, and I wanted to prove to me and everyone else that he made the right decision. That I could handle being the head of Riggins Enterprises.”
“She wanted more time with you.”
I nod. “I thought so too, so I decided to surprise her. I left the office early and picked up dinner and some flowers. I wanted a night with my wife. I wanted to show her that she was— Anyway, I got there, and the house was quiet. I made my way upstairs to our bedroom and heard moaning.” She gasps, but I keep on. “I pushed open the door and found her and her best friend, Sandra, naked in our bed. They were… let’s just say there were toys and lots of things I can never unsee.”
“I-I don’t know what to say to that.”
“Apparently, they had been sleeping together for years. Jennifer used me as her cover. She signed a prenup and thankfully left quietly. She never apologized. Her exact words were ‘why are you home early?’” I shake my head, warding off the memory.
“Not to poke fun, but isn’t that kind of every man’s fantasy? You know two women in his bed?” There is a sparkle in her eyes, one that tells me she’s trying to lighten the mood.
“No. Not this guy.”
“Really?” she asks, surprised.
“I don’t share, Sawyer.” She swallows hard.
“No sharing. Got it.”
“She crushed me. Our marriage wasn’t perfect, but I loved her. At least I thought I did. Looking back, I’m not so sure. We dated in college, and marriage seemed like the logical next step.”
“Did you, I mean, what about sex?”
“I hate talking about this, let alone to a beautiful woman lying in my bed.” That’s not just a line. I hate talking about my ex-wife, period. I hate it even more that we’re doing it now. However, something tells me that this is important. I need her to understand. She’s always talking about my layers, and this is one of them. I want her to have this missing piece, or layer if you will.
“We don’t have to.” She’s quick to give me an out.
“It’s okay. I want you to know.” I take a minute to think about how to describe my sex life with my ex-wife. “We had sex, often, and it was good, but it was always missing that… spark. I chalked it up to being together for so long and being comfortable. They say that the new wears off, and I thought that’s what happened with us. Now that I’m away from the relationship, looking back, I realize that it was never there.” Not like it is here. In this moment, lying in bed next to her. The sparks are igniting between us. Her touch is like fire to my cheek, and I want to go down in flames with her.
“Spark is important,” she agrees, her voice barely a whisper.
Needing to touch her, I raise my hand and rest it against her cheek. “I never felt like this with her,” I confess. She’s quiet, but her green eyes tell me what her words aren’t. She feels it too.
“Royce?” Her voice is soft, but we’re lying so close to one another she might as well be shouting.
“Yeah?”
“Will you do me a favor?”
“Anything.” I mean that with all that I am. I would do anything for her. I can’t explain why I feel this way. My heart beats faster when she’s near, I’ve done nothing but think about her since the moment we met, and lying here with her next to me, nothing has ever felt this right.
