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His eyebrows furrowed hard again. “What do you mean he liked it? That shit hurts.”
“I like it,” I said in a quieter tone. “It feels good.”
He let out a sharp breath between his lips and shook his head, sitting back. “You’re just high. You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I did like it!”
He glanced at the walls again, staring at them. His hand rested on my knee. “It’s still bullshit,” he said. “It’s all fucked up. Every one of them. They can’t do that to you.”
This wasn’t going how I wanted. “Honey,” I pleaded, wanting to change it.
“I promise, Sang,” he said. “They won’t do it to you again.”
“No!” My lips tore apart and a loud sob escaped me.
“It’s wrong,” he said. “You’re getting bruised.”
“No,” I cried again, and this time curled up on my side, staring at the wall. I cried with my eyes open. I did mess up. I told him the truth and now he was going to tell them to stop. And he was saying I was messed up if I liked it. He thought the drugs made me like it?
He sat still. The only motion was his hand on my calf rubbing me. I kicked at it. Angry. He was going to ruin everything. I couldn’t get myself to stop crying long enough to tell him this.
I don’t know how long I was like that, but the next moment, someone was parting my eyelid and a bright light was shining in.
“She keeps crying,” Nathan said
“Sang,” Dr. Green said. There was a pat on my cheek, and then pain, so it wasn’t a pat, but a slap.
“Stop,” I said. When did he get here? Did I daze out?
“It’s affecting her harder than the others,” Dr. Green said. “She hasn’t been eating. She’s been weak. We need to get an IV in her.”
“Does she need to go to the hospital?” It was Kota’s voice, but I didn’t see him.
“We can’t even take her to the Academy hospital like this,” he said. “First her sister, and now her? They’ll have us all under investigation.”
“If she’s dying, take her to the fucking hospital!” Nathan shouted.
“We need to flush it out of her system,” Dr. Green said. “She needs fluid. If we can dilute this, she’ll get out of this.”
“We can flush it out at the hospital,” Nathan shouted again. “Let me take her. I should have taken her there in the first place.”
I turned my head, my mouth open and trying to say something, but my whole head was numb and vibrating.
Kota had his jacket off, but left his tie and white shirt on. His tie swaying back and forth was amusing to me, until I realized why it was swaying like that. He was shoving at Nathan. Nathan was trying to dodge to get around him.
“Stop,” Kota said. “You’re overreacting.”
“You,” Nathan said, pointing a finger at Kota. His bicep muscles flexing. “You just want to keep her a secret.”
“She’s not that secret,” Dr. Green said. “I’m telling you, if we can get fluids into her...”
“You don’t even have any room to talk,” Nathan said, swinging his pointer finger around. “You kissed her and now you want to keep her away from people. You don’t want them to know.”
“Hold on now,” Dr. Green said. He stepped into my field of view this time, holding his hands up. His beautiful green eyes turning harsh and his usual happy face so serious, he didn’t appear to be the same person. “Don’t get all crazy. This isn’t the time to talk about this.”
“Let me take her to the hospital,” Nathan said. “I’ll take her to the close one.”
Nathan shoved his way around Kota, but Kota kept blocking him away from me. Nathan grunted, shoving back.
“Nathan, stop! Silas,” Kota shouted.
Silas lunged at Nathan, pushing him back. My head rocked back, shocked that Silas was there at all, because I hadn’t heard a word from him.
I tried to sit up, regretting the move instantly. It felt like I was trying to sit, but the next thing I knew, my face was against the carpet.
“Hold up there, shortcake.” It was Luke this time. Arms surrounded me along my shoulders and another set along my knees. I was hoisted up.
I fought against them. I cried, calling out for Nathan. I pleaded with Kota to let him go. I didn’t want to go to the hospital. I thought I was dying. My stomach lurched. The room spun.
I couldn’t stop myself, the moment Luke had me around my stomach, pinning my arms down, and someone had me by my legs, I was squirming. Resisting because I couldn’t control my muscles. When they pushed me down, I wanted to sit up and fought and clawed for them to let me. “I can’t get a needle in her arm if she’s fighting like this,” Dr. Green said.
“We have to restrain her,” Kota said.
I howled. The words weren’t what I wanted. Tying me down? Like my mother? Like he promised he wouldn’t? I couldn’t get my vocal cords to work, though, so it was a screeching cry. Moaning.
I was moved to a bed. I think it was my own, but I didn’t feel like I’d gone upstairs, so I wasn’t sure.
Then I spotted a television, and a tall dresser, and brown wallpaper with ivy along the border.
Flashes of my mother came at me, and I thrashed and cowered. I shouldn’t be in her room. She’ll come after me. She’ll put me back in the shower.
“Sang!” Kota shouted.
My eyes snapped open and Kota’s face loomed over me.
“Calm down,” he said in a quieter tone. “We’re not hurting you. Your mother isn’t coming back.”
Did I say it all out loud? It didn’t feel like it, but I couldn’t remember.
There was a pinch in my arm. An IV came into view. I tried to move my arms but couldn’t. I tugged harder but my arms were tied. I tried my legs and they were tied, too.
I moaned. I cried. I pulled at my restraints. I didn’t want to. I wanted to listen to Kota but I couldn’t stop myself.
“Can’t you give her a sedative?” Silas’s voice boomed.
“It might cause a bad reaction to the drug. I don’t want to put her into a coma.”
“There’s some in my bag,” I said, although I think I screamed it. And then I remembered I couldn’t scream. I don’t know what I was hearing, but it was awful screeching. “Silas, Rocky says he’s sorry. He gave me a bottle.”
I said it again. I repeated Silas’s name. I called for Nathan. I pleaded with Kota. I repeated their names over and over because I didn’t know who I could reach out to. In my desperate state, I needed someone. Anyone.
“Kota!” Luke cried.
The pitch was higher. Shot with such panic that even I quieted. Luke? What was wrong with Luke?
“It’s your mom,” Luke said. “Nathan’s dad was there. He’s looking for Nathan.”
There was a shuffle. Voices all at once.
The room quieted.
I was alone. Restrained. IV in my arm and it itched and I wanted to take it out.
My mother’s room.
My fake mother’s bedroom.
Sang Sorenson.
I thought the name and then lost it, because I didn’t feel like myself any more.
Then I suddenly did. For a moment, I was the old Sang.
Invisible.
Silenced.
Forgotten.
WE MAY NOT BE CLOSE,
BUT WE AREN’T MONSTERS
The creak of the door didn’t surprise me. Some part of me thought it might be Gabriel. Maybe he finally showed up. Was he going to wash my hair? Another thought was that it might be Nathan. Did he come back from an Academy job? Mr. Blackbourne was going to ground me again because I was really tired now.
I drifted. I felt like I was lifting weights when I opened my eyes, dragging myself up from a heavy, dreamless sleep.
I was in my mother’s room, but couldn’t remember why.
Fingers wove through my hair.
“Gab...” I started to say.
The fingers snagged, and wrenched my head to t
he side, yanking some strands out. My face was shoved against a pillow.
I screamed, but no sound came out. I reached up, my arms snagged against restraints. I clawed at the bed and my nails met with an arm and sank into flesh. Flashes of Mr. McCoy and Jade swept through my mind. I was going to fight them off.
But it was Mr. Griffin’s eyes that met mine. Harsh and ruthless.
“No...” I started to cry out, but my voice failed.
“Fucking whore,” he screamed. He cupped his hand over his arm. There were cuts on his face, and his cheek had been stitched. Part of his head was shaved, with more stitches showing.
How did he get in here? I scrambled to get up, but was still tied down.
A hand collided with my mouth. The sting radiated from a single point where my lip split, and spread throughout my mouth until my bones rattled together. I blinked hard. My arms wrenched against the restraints to protect myself, but I was only pulling my joints apart, The tethers held; I was helpless.
“I told you to stay out of my house!”
When did he get back? I slid backward, trying to draw myself up and away from him. Where was Kota? Or Nathan?
