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The more he spoke, the more animated he got, like he was getting more excited about his ideas.
My cheeks radiated with heat. “Live together?” I asked. He hadn’t said it out loud, but I got he was hinting at that. I breathed slowly, absorbing this. Somehow, it felt like he’d been thinking of this for a while. To test this, I tried another question from a different angle. “Do you like small houses?”
His lips lifted into a smile. “I was reading on these compact homes. Some they built out of shipping containers. Very practical about space. They’re small spaces. I was thinking it’d be nice with a small yard. Cozy. You like cozy areas, I’ve noticed.”
My mouth opened up. I couldn’t express the words. I had no idea what type of house I liked, because I hadn’t thought of having one before. I was just trying to survive high school. Kota had been thinking of buying a house for me at the end of the year.
We hadn’t even really kissed yet.
It made a little sense, though. He was thinking ahead. Where would I live once I was out of high school? Maybe it wasn’t possible to live in Nathan’s house forever. He’d eventually move out of his mom’s house. He was thinking of things I hadn’t considered yet.
My heart melted a lot. Excitement zipped through me as I imagined his vision. It wasn’t what I’d pictured. Then I realized I’d been picturing Lily’s house and situation, and in essence, I had been thinking along the same lines. Even though I hadn’t kissed him yet, I still included him in the scenario. My daydreams involved who would be there, not what the house looked like. Again, testing his thoughts, I went on, “If we got something a little out of the way, maybe in the woods, maybe away from other people...”
“That could happen,” Kota said, sitting up more in the driver’s seat. His face lifted. “You’d like a cabin?”
“I was just thinking, if we had a plot of land and filled it with small homes...”
“We could rent them out?” he asked.
“We could...” I said, smiling at his drifting thoughts. “Or maybe even, if you’re okay with it, have some of the others living nearby. Like Nathan and Luke and...”
He blinked repeatedly. “Oh?”
Maybe that wasn’t what he’d pictured. I tried, delicately, to fix it. “I mean, you’ll still be part of the family, right?”
“Yeah,” he said slowly.
“I don’t know,” I said, letting it sound like a passing thought. “I guess I’m used to the others being close by. Wouldn’t it be easier—if you’re still working with them in the Academy—to have them close enough so you could walk over? Or they can come over whenever?” That sounded better. Like he was living with me, and they were just neighbors. For now.
“Oh,” he said. He seemed to perk back up at this. “I hadn’t thought of it that way. I couldn’t imagine Victor wanting to live in a small house. He wouldn’t be able to fit his piano in.”
“Maybe,” I said, going with his thoughts. “Or we’d have to get him a second shipping container. Oh well. I guess at some point we’d figure it out.”
He nodded, although he seemed happier than before. “If we’re still a team, they’ll be around all the time anyway. We just need to get through this school year.”
If we managed to survive. At the same time, I was grateful. It might take a while to convince Kota of the new plan. The concept was a hard one to swallow. I hadn’t fully absorbed the thought either.
I felt bad not telling him about it. I kept sneaking peeks at his face: he was smiling, happy. Whatever I’d said, he’d changed in the car today. In my heart, I knew it. He was really, really happy.
I was glad for it, but hoped I wasn’t giving him the wrong idea, either about living together alone without the others, or about not joining the Academy. I still wanted to join.
Maybe he was more worried about the group not being able to stay together if I joined, because he’d want to be on the team I was on.
I held onto this thought. If that was true, then maybe he would be interested in keeping the family together, like Lily had done.
Still, I didn’t dare bring it up. It was easier when I knew the person had already been introduced to it and liked it. Somehow it was different if Mr. Blackbourne brought it up to them, and not me. From me, it felt like a selfish request. From North or the others, it seemed like their idea. It was, in a way. North’s interest was what sparked Luke to listen in on phone calls, and us to find out what was going on.
After a while of more driving, Kota said he managed to shake off our tail, mostly by draining the tank of the other car.
“We were getting pretty low, too,” he said. He tapped at the gas meter. “Good thing North put in the new bigger gas tank on my car.”
“They’re gone now,” I said. “At least they didn’t have backup to keep following us.”
“At least it wasn’t McCoy, again,” he said.
I didn’t see who was following us, but I was glad it wasn’t McCoy either. “Is he still chasing Gabriel?”
He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and held it while he drove, but did nothing else with it. “I should check on him.”
“I can, if you’d like,” I said.
He started to pass his cell phone to me and then retracted it. “I can’t...let you...sorry.”
He can’t show me his cell phone. There must be some Academy things in there he didn’t want me to see. Funny how he was willing to swap earlier though. Had something happened during that time? Gabriel didn’t hesitate to give me his when I asked out of the blue, when he wasn’t paying attention at all. He just did it.
I pulled out Gabriel’s cell phone. “I can do it.”
Kota’s cheeks tinted and he nodded.
This was a good excuse to see what Gabriel was up to. Maybe he would be more talkative now.
Sang: Meanie, are you okay?
After a few minutes and no response, I tried again.
Sang: Kota wants to know how you’re doing. Is McCoy still following you?
I wasn’t sure what else to say. Was he busy like North said?
It took a few more minutes, but a reply finally came.
Gabriel: Tell him I’m fine. McCoy is following me.
Tell him. He wasn’t going to respond to me? I tried not to read between the lines and make judgements on what was going on while he wasn’t here. It was hard to not wonder about his meaning, or if there was any meaning at all. North had said if he was busy, he may be keeping it short.
So I tried Luke. He was there. He might know.
Sang: Hey, it’s Sang. I tried to find his car, but we couldn’t figure out which one it was. He might have already bought it.
Sang: Also, Gabriel still seems upset to me. Is he or am I just imagining things?
I’d have to delete the messages later so Gabriel wouldn’t see. A few minutes passed and Luke responded.
Luke: I tried asking him about his birthday and what he wanted to do. He said he didn’t want to do anything.
Luke: That’s not really like him. He is cranky from not sleeping, but he’s never missed a chance to take advantage of his birthday.
I fiddled with my phone. That wasn’t good. I asked Luke to keep an eye on him, and he promised to do so.
“What’s wrong?” Kota asked. “Is there trouble?”
I sighed. “Gabriel says he’s fine...”
“You don’t believe him?” Kota asked.
I glanced at Kota. He was always very aware of everyone. He knew where everyone was. He even knew when someone was running out of groceries. He managed our group. While Mr. Blackbourne dealt with Academy issues, Kota focused on us.
Would he know how to handle Gabriel when he was upset?
I looked for a way to ask him without revealing the details. “I think he’s mad at me,” I said. “Or mad in general. It’s hard to tell.”
Kota was silent for a while. “Why would he be mad at you?” he asked.
