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She’d confronted my father downstairs, and he was very quick to try to stop her from calling around about me.
“It’ll cost more money to take her out of school,” he said.
“She can’t go to school and faint,” Carol said. “Did you hear what Sean said about that horrible school? Also, we don’t know what’s wrong with her. We should get her to a doctor to find out.”
“She’s probably got the flu.”
“If she goes to school and faints, they’ll insist on a doctor,” she said.
He quieted after that, considering his options.
Carol’s arguments were technically on my side, fighting for what most people would. She was pushing him to treat me like normal humans are treated, not like a mistake to be hidden. Seeing a doctor. Resting. Saving me from a school with a bad reputation. She was technically in the right.
As she continued to prod him, he finally shook his head. “She’s a troublemaker. Don’t let her fool you. Her mother said repeatedly how she’d lie and do crazy things to get what she wanted.”
“Her mother is in the hospital,” Carol said. “I’m here, and if she’s that bad, you don’t want her in a school with bad people. Place her in my care. I’ll take care of the details.”
“What about the private school?” he asked.
Carol laughed shortly. “What? You just said she was a troublemaker. She doesn’t deserve to go. And her sister doesn’t have the grades. And outside of that, if we’re moving, we’d need to wait to send them to school in Georgia, not here.”
My father groaned but then said to talk about it in the morning and to go to bed.
Their conversation at least told me she didn’t know about my real mother. It didn’t help that my father spread lies about me. I wondered if Carol had fallen for it.
How many more lies would be spread? Marie had stayed in her room the whole time. I wasn’t sure if she knew what was going on. If she thought this wasn’t going her way, she might try telling Carol the truth. How much worse would it get if Carol found out? What changes would she make to our lives then?
I repeated everything I knew to Kota. I made the suggestion that I could talk to Marie tomorrow.
When everything was sent to Kota, the phone went silent.
Slowly, I got messages from some of them. I replied back.
Silas: Are you okay?
Sang: Sleepy. I’m okay, though. It’s just like before. Was too tired.
Silas: I mean staying there tonight. With Jimmy in the room.
Sang: I don’t have another option right now.
Silas: We’ll fix it. I’ll fix it.
Victor: Can I get anything to you for tonight? I could send Luke in. Extra pillow? Do you need water?
Sang: I’m okay. I’ll just sleep. It’s been a crazy night.
Victor: Be careful, princess. Please. I miss you.
Sang: Miss you, too.
Nathan: This sucks.
Sang: Yeah.
Nathan: I could still sneak into the attic. So I’m nearby.
Sang: Don’t do that. Last thing we need is Carol catching someone in the house. Then she’d never trust me.
Nathan: I don’t know what else to do.
Sang: Me either.
North: Let me send you something to help you sleep. Something the doc can give you. Tylenol PM. Sleep, okay?
Sang: I’ll try to sleep. I don’t have much else to do now.
I tried my best to be brave, to let them know I’d wait for the next plan.
I pushed them to think of what to do next, they pushed me to sleep. I eventually turned the phone off when they stopped messaging.
What else was there to do? Mr. Blackbourne had asked if I could wait for a month or more if necessary, but that was the old plan. Yet, how long would it take now?
They had taken risks. They were spending all this time focused on me. Had North even been home? Had anyone focused on any of their own problems since we’d been back?
I left the phone nearby, with a smidgen of hope that they’d figure something out and would alert me.
As I waited, I opened the notebook.
I started writing in my Korean lettering as my secret code. I thought I would at least write until I was too tired to continue. At first, I only wrote out their names, as if practicing writing in the language. I hadn’t done it much for a while, but it only took a few minutes for me to be able to remember to write out a sentence like I’d done before.
I’d failed at keeping my health in check, like Mr. Blackbourne had asked.
I’d failed at convincing Carol to allow me to go to private school, and to allow me space outside of the house.
There was one thing I didn’t wish to fail at: letting them know how I felt, and asking how they felt in return.
I considered how to structure it, and I opted to write separate letters to each of them. I wrote in pen, since that was what I had, and many times I ended up scratching out lines. Everything sounded silly at first.
I only finished one before my eyes were too tired to continue.
The one for Dr. Green.
Two Sides
DR. GREEN
Sean and Owen stood in the woods behind Sang’s house for a few minutes after they left.
It was hard to leave her. Sean was so angry, shaking his head, shivering, but not from the cold.
He was trying to calm himself so he wouldn’t bite Owen’s head off for wanting to get back to the security trailer.
They walked back slowly. Sean kept his head down, following Owen’s flashlight.
But all he could think was this was the wrong decision. Leaving her there. Alone. Even if they hovered just outside the window, or snuck around the house...
And then that look she had given him. It felt like they were abandoning her.
They returned to the edge of the parking lot. A few cars lingered in front of the diner. Deep, threatening voices carried to them as they got closer to the trailer.
What now?
Sean raced up the steps ahead of Owen, throwing open the door to get inside.
“Like hell we’ll leave her there now,” North was saying. He stood face-to-face with Kota.
Kota met him dead on, shoulders back, features tight. Nathan and Silas stood behind him, glaring. Victor stood behind them, arms crossed, leaning against a table.
North had Gabriel and Luke behind him. The trailer wasn’t wide, so the entire group took up a lot of the floor space that wasn’t already taken up by chairs, a couple of desks and some cots leaning up against the wall.
One of them shouted something that was quickly overwhelmed when Silas boomed out a groan. Arguing erupted, with everyone shouting loud enough that no one could hear anyone else.
At least no one was swinging fists yet.
Owen walked in, saying nothing. Sean stood beside him, watching them.
No one acknowledged them, and they might not have really noticed them entering. They continued to argue.
“We’re not busting in,” Kota said in sharp tones.
“We’re taking her,” Gabriel said. “Fuck all this shit.”
“She hates all this,” Luke bellowed. “You haven’t seen her—”
“I saw her earlier,” Kota said. “You’re not listening to what she wants. She’s there now, asking for the next plan.”
“We need to ask her,” Victor said. “See what she wants. She may want to wait it out.”
“She’s never going to tell you to take her out,” North said. “We tell her to stay strong. To stick with it.”
“It’s fucked up,” Gabriel said. “She’d never tell us to get her out because we tell her this is the best way.”
“Taking her may mean losing her,” Silas boomed at them. “An Academy council won’t approve if Carol calls around about a kidnapping.”
They continued, shouting in circles. It was impossible to hear anyone.
