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"Not the word I'd use." Ryan steps forward. He nods to me in that I don't think there's any reason why we need to show compassion toward each other Ryan kind of way. "You're always welcome here, Kaylee."

"Thanks." I study his expression. Should we hug? Shake hands? Uh... I step forward. Move my hands out from my sides.

Ryan pulls me into a hug. It's quick. Messy. Awkward. He steps back, wipes his brow, sighs. Let's never do that again.

Dean jumps to his feet. He actually jumps from his position flat on his back. That's circus acrobat stuff.

He looks to Walker. "You joining this party too?"

Walker shrugs, effortlessly cool. He's the type who takes everything in stride. Nothing bothers him. Or so he claims.

He's a lot like Brendon, really. He's tall and broad with dark hair and dark eyes. He has that same tendency to keep everything to himself. But, with Walker, his typical state is fun, party boy. With Brendon it's serious, quiet artist.

They're the same, but they're opposites too.

He takes his turn hugging me then motions to the booze set up behind us. "What are you drinking?"

Uh... making a fool of myself at my party was bad enough. I'm not doing it in front of everyone.

But I'm not going to be the weird girl who doesn't drink either.

"Jack and diet," I say.

"A girl after my own heart." Walker winks. He brings me to the counter/bar, pours a generous cocktail for me and a straight whiskey for himself. "You're starting school soon, yeah?"

"Two weeks."

He looks to the party—Dean, Emma, and Ryan are in some triangle of teasing. Ryan is actually laughing. Weird.

"Where's Brendon?" I take a sip of my drink. Not bad. Like a richer version of soda. One that destroys my inhibitions. Gets me saying all the things I need to keep secret.

"Something ab

out mind your own business." Walker laughs. "I think he's making something for you."

"Yeah?" My voice jumps two octaves.

"The glimpse I caught looked fucking amazing."

"You're not gonna give me a hint?"

He shakes his head. "More fun this way."

"Cruel."

"Maybe."

"How was the meeting? Was he excited."

"Yeah. Well, for Brendon. You know him. Deadpan."

"And you?"

"Hey, I'm charming. He's—"

"He's charming."

"Well, yeah." He looks me in the eyes. "You tend to find people charming when you're into them."

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