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I can’t help but laugh. “There were bright colors in there.”
He shoots me a look get real.
I set the powder blue suit on the rack. It is a little eighties. Okay, really eighties. “How about navy?” I move to the next rack. Pick up a classy suit in a perfect soft navy. “It will bring out your eyes.”
“So will black.”
Like his glasses. Mmm, Ryan in glasses. Ryan in nothing but glasses. Ryan in nothing.
Ahem.
I shake it off. Move to another rack. The air conditioner’s hum drowns out the elevator music. It’s quiet in the menswear section. We’re the only customers here.
“This is perfect.” Ryan holds up the black suit.
“You’ll look like you’re going to a funeral.”
“Maybe I am.”
“Oh.” Frustration slips into my voice.
“Not like that, Leigh.”
I swallow hard. “Like what?”
The guy behind the counter motions to us need help?
I wave him over.
Ryan shoots me a look. Was that necessary?
I nod.
He moves close enough to whisper. “I feel a little less sick every time I see her.” He runs his thumb over the soft black wool. “Part of me wants her to marry him.”
“Part?”
“More every day.” His breath warms my ear. “Three weeks and it could be all of me. This could be the end of her hold on me.”
Or he could stand up during the ceremony and say I know why you can’t wed. I still love you. And they could ride into the sunset together.
“Can I help you find anything?” The salesguy flashes us a serene smile.
“Yes, thanks. Can you convince my…” What the hell do I call Ryan? “Can you convince him he shouldn’t wear black to a beach wedding?”
“It’s whatever the bride wants,” the salesguy says. “You must be used to that by now.”
“No, we’re not.” I swallow hard. “It’s not our—”
Ryan laughs at my nervousness. “All right. If you insist, baby. I’ll try a grey suit.”
“Excellent.” The salesguy turns to me. “Please, have a seat. I’ll make sure he’s taken care of.” He whisks Ryan toward the dressing room.
I settle onto the plush blue couch. Stare into the three-panel mirror. Between the smoky eye, the soft purple hair, and the raspberry lips, I do look every part the punk rock princess.
But it doesn’t satisfy me the way it usually does.
Looking hot and tough isn’t enough.
