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“Jesus, so I act nice, and that must mean we’re fucking.”
“We are.”
“They don’t know that.”
I laughed a little. “That’s exactly what I thought, but still, it doesn’t change the fact that you’ve been extra nice, right around the time that we started working together.”
“I hate these politics. You know that, right?”
“You’ve made that abundantly clear.”
“Really hate it.” He paced back and forth, hands behind his back. “We should get out ahead of this. Tell everyone we’re definitely not sleeping together.”
“Right, that’ll fix it.”
He glanced at me and rolled his eyes. “What do you suggest then?”
“I suggest we do nothing.”
He stopped pacing and considered me. “Explain.”
“There’s nothing we can do,” I said, holding my hands out. “Look, even if we wanted to say something, and there was the perfect statement we could make, it would only make us look that much guiltier. Right now, it’s probably nothing more than an ugly rumor.”
“An ugly rumor could ruin me right now.”
“True, but still, I don’t think we can do anything about it.”
“You realize how fucked this is? If I keep being myself, then everyone will keep on thinking I’m a huge asshole, and nothing changes. If I keep being nice, everyone thinks we’re fucking, which is arguably even worse, and nothing changes. Either way, Gina and Caroline find some flimsy bullshit excuse to get rid of me, and the world keeps turning.”
“I know,” I said, shaking my head. “It’s a bad situation.”
“There’s got to be something we can do.” He tilted his head and stroked his chin. “Maybe we could get married. You know, fake marriage.”
“I think that only works on TV.”
He threw his hands up. “I don’t know what to do then. Get you pregnant?”
“How would that help?”
“I don’t know, I’m just thinking about fucking you.”
I laughed and went to him, tugging at the front of his scrubs until he pinned me back up against the door. He kissed my neck, then my lips, and I held him there for a long moment, feeling his warm, hard body against mine. It felt good, safe and incredible, and I loved his smell, even mixed with the scent of antiseptic from the operating room.
“No babies,” I said. “No fake marriages. We’re going to handle this like normal, functioning human beings.”
“That’s overrated. How about I fuck you here and now, and we blow off the rest of the day?”
“Tempting. I’m pretty sure that would only confirm everyone’s suspicions though.”
“Let it. I think I’m starting to give up.”
“Don’t.” I reached up and ran my hand through his hair and tugged. “I need you in this. You’re not done teaching me.”
“Ah, come on. You’re ready.”
“I’m really not.”
“Okay, you’re not, but you’re improving a lot.”
I grinned and kissed him. “Tell me why I put up with you again?”
“Because we have a deal, and because I’m very, very good at what I do. And also in bed.”
“There you go. That’ll do it.”
He kissed me, held it for a long moment, and I felt a spark of desire in me, and maybe we could blow off the rest of the day—what would it matter, really? Let the nurses and the staff gossip all they wanted. I’d be too busy sweating, letting Piers fuck me deep and rough, letting him get me off again and again.
But no, we had to be normal, functioning adults.
I broke off the kiss and put some space between us again. “All right, before you get too wound up, we have to start prepping for the next surgery.”
“Damn,” he said. “I guess we do.”
I sat down in his chair and forced myself to concentrate as he leaned over my shoulder, and we both got to work.
22
Piers
It was a quiet morning as I made my rounds. I gave Lori the morning off for good behavior—her surgery the day before had been very well done, and I was feeling pretty pleased with her progress.
We’d been training together for only a few months, and she was already coming along. Most surgical residents took years before they were able to perform flawlessly, but it only took Lori months to master that procedure—though it was only one of many she’d inevitably learn.
I was positive she could do it. Despite everything else crumbling down around me, at least she was a success. Going into this, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to teach her—I’d never tried to teach someone before, and the thought never really occurred to me. But it was apparent I could do it, so long as my student was already talented and smart, which really helped the whole thing.
Ahead and down the hall, I heard some shouts come from a room. One of the nurses, a woman I recognized named Tammie, rushed from the nurses’ station and ran inside. There was another shout, and I jogged toward them, looking around. There were no other nurses around, no other attendings.
