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“I would’ve given you anything,” he went on, calming himself down. If she was leaving, then he wanted her to be fully aware of what she was leaving behind. “I’ve never opened my heart or my life to another woman after my wife left. I swore it wasn’t worth the heartache and Piper needed stability. Then you came back and I couldn’t stop myself even if I wanted to. You stirred something so deep within me. It had nothing to do with the crush I had on you when I’d been younger; it had nothing to do with you being Paul’s daughter.”
Jax took a deep breath and closed the space between them, finally reaching for her because he wanted to touch her, just once more. He slid his hands over her fac
e, his fingertips sliding into her hair. “My feelings had everything to do with the fact I’d fallen in love with you.”
Livie’s mouth dropped open. “What?”
“Believe me, I didn’t want to love you. I even tried to deny it. There’s nothing I can do to make you stay and I don’t want you here when your heart is so obviously in Atlanta.”
He leaned in, brushing his lips against hers before stepping back and releasing her. “Even though you’re leaving, I still love you. I probably always will, but I can keep my personal feelings out of this business.”
Livie’s shaky hands came up to her lips. “Is that true?”
“What?”
Her hand dropped to her side. “Will you keep everything separate?”
With a shrug, he answered honestly. “I have to. I won’t make things more complicated for you.”
Livie stood there for a moment, then busted out laughing. “Complicated? Do you want to know what’s complicated? I wanted the COO position for years. I’d worked on nothing else but gaining the attention of my superiors. I busted my ass and turned down dates, missed social events with my friends, and lost sleep over that damn promotion. But nothing was as complicated as when I came into town and you put your greasy hands all over my ass.”
He wasn’t going to apologize for that, either.
“Complicated is knowing that when I get back to Atlanta and walk into my condo, it will feel empty. I’ll be alone and I’ll be wondering what you’re doing here. I’ll want to know if you and Piper are having movie night, I’ll wonder how she is the next time a storm comes through. And I’ll get that urge to fly again with nowhere to turn.”
Jax fisted his hands at his sides because he wanted so badly to reach for her again. But he waited, listened, as she seemed to be working out her internal battle.
“Complicated is also right this moment,” she went on, looking up at him. “I need to leave, but when I’m with you, I realize there’s nowhere else I’d rather be. Not in my condo, not in the big city, and not even in my brand-new cushy office.”
For the first time since she’d declared she was really leaving, a sliver of hope slid through him. But he remained silent and still.
“I’m scared,” she whispered as she reached for him. Her fingers curled in his and she brought their joined hands between them. “What if I go and I’m miserable without you? What if I stay and wonder what it would’ve been like in the job I’ve always wanted?”
“The answer is simple,” he told her. “Only you can know which one you want more. You’ll have a career either place, but your lifestyle will be vastly different.”
She glanced to the suit she’d tossed onto his desk. The feel of her delicate hands in his had him wanting to continue to hold tight and never let go.
“I’ve worked so hard to be a COO.”
“I understand that,” he replied, urging her closer until she fell against his chest. He disengaged their hands and wrapped his arms around her. “But know this: If you stay, you’ll be the only COO here because I hate numbers and I don’t want that title.”
A slight smile formed on her lips.
“I told myself I wasn’t going to ask you to stay because I wanted you to make up your own mind. But, damn it, Livie. I need you. I don’t want to run this place without you. I don’t want to do anything without you. But if you need to go to Atlanta and figure things out, I won’t stop you.”
Her bright eyes brimming with unshed tears stared back at him. “I’m not sure leaving would make things more clear. I love you, Jax. Whether I’m here or there, that won’t change.”
Crushing her against his chest, he closed his eyes and inhaled her. “Finally,” he murmured against her ear.
Her arms wrapped around him. “Will you still take the plane? Because it’s kind of legally done and I don’t have anywhere else to store it.”
Jax laughed and eased back, framing her face between his hands. “I’ll only take the plane if you’re here to fly it.”
“Are you sure about this?” she asked, worry lacing her voice. “You want me? You want us?”
He nipped at her lips. “Have I ever given you the impression I don’t want you? I want the hell out of you and I don’t just mean on this desk. I want you, I want us, I want a family.”
Livie’s eyes widened. “What will Piper say?”
