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My eyes snap open, and I round on him, letting the full heat of my fury burn in my gaze. “I don’t know. You wanna learn how to fly? This mountain’s pretty steep.”
A grin touches the corners of his full lips. “Hate to break it to you, kitty, but I love it when you bring the claws.”
I clench my hands into fists and turn to walk away from him. “God, you never fucking stop, do you?”
Before I can make it two steps, Malix’s fingers wrap around my bicep, and he hauls me back to him.
“Amora.” His voice is serious, all amusement gone from his face. He looks cold. Hard. Unbelievably sexy. “Come on. Would you just listen to me for a minute?”
I growl and jerk my arm from his grasp. But I don’t walk away. For some godforsaken reason, there’s a part of me that wants to hear what he has to say. A part of me that hopes, as it always has, that these men will surprise me.
“Fine,” I bite out. “I’m listening. What?”
Malix lets out a breath and glances around, rubbing a hand back over his cropped hair. “Look, Quinton wasn’t lying when he said finding the shadow realm is our only purpose.”
“Because he said so?” I shoot back.
“No. Because it’s true,” Malix snarls. “Do you have any idea what it’s like to have no reason for existing beyond one thing?”
Oh that’s easy. All I have to do is think about the years I lost hunting for these assholes.
“Yeah. I do know. But that doesn’t mean it’s right. You may have some grand purpose, but it would hurt so many people. How could you live with yourself?”
“People get hurt all the time,” he says with a shrug, his eyes shuttering. “People die all the time. It’s just part of living. So I’d live with myself just fine, because it doesn’t fucking matter.”
He would know about death, after all. He knew about it early, like me. But that’s no reason to think nobody’s lives matter in the grand scheme of things.
“What about your sister?” I challenge, my voice hard. “Did she not matter?”
Malix’s dispassionate expression falls away, replaced by a grimace of pain. He glances away from me, his violet eyes scanning the woods instead of my face. “That’s not fair.”
“She didn’t deserve what happened to her,” I point out. “She didn’t deserve to die so young. But that doesn’t mean it’s okay to kill other people just because you’ve seen something like that happen to someone you loved. If anything, it should make you value every single life a little more.”
Malix swallows visibly, still avoiding my gaze. Somewhere nearby, a woodpecker knocks on a tree, and farther in the distance, birds sing. It’s a beautiful day for a dark conversation.
Pain has marred his brow and turned his face to dark granite.
I step closer to him and slide my palm against his cheek. His jaw is stubbly beneath my hand. With the slightest bit of pressure, I turn him back to me and meet his hard gaze.
“You’re right in one way,” I tell him softly. “The world is random. Chaotic. Brutal. That’s enough to make a person think nothing matters. But things can matter—people can matter—if you decide they do. If you give meaning to things and fight for what you believe in, then things do matter.”
Malix lets out a shuddery breath. His palms skim up my arms, and I can feel the warmth of them even through the robe. I rest my own hands against his chest where I can feel his heart beating beneath his borrowed hoodie. He’s beautiful, like a shadow in the sunlight, perfectly formed and separate from the light but just as lovely.
He steps a little closer to me, his fingers tightening on my biceps. His palms slide higher, over my shoulders, then he drags me against him, one hand tangling in my hair.
My breath catches in my throat as heat and attraction build between us while we gaze at each other in the peaceful sunshine. My gaze slips to his lips, and I imagine kissing him like we did back in New Mexico, when we fucked on the bank of the lake and the stars aligned.
Affection rises in me at the memory. A strange sort of familiarity and comfort, like coming home after a long time away.
Why? Why does it feel this way?
Those deeper emotions scare the shit out of me, and I take a step back and stare up at him, unnerved. “What are you doing to me?”
He chuckles, his thumb brushing over my lips. “I’m not doing anything.”
I sway toward him against my will, my lips parting as if I want to draw his thumb into my mouth. As if I want to devour him. Maybe I do.
“Is this the mate bond?” I whisper. “It can’t be.”
Malix leans closer, his face so close I can feel his breath on my skin. “Can’t it?”
He’s too close. I’m drowning in his scent, in the warmth rolling off his body, in the depths of his startling eyes. There’s no way I can fight this rising need in me. It’s like a drug taking over my system. A poison like the one that almost killed me.
And just like the poison, I can’t fight it.
Our lips meet with a desperation I can’t understand. His mouth is satin, his skin cold from the brisk air, but I yield to his kiss like it’s the oxygen I need to survive. Within moments, the heat between us chases away the chill and leaves only a burning desire.
I wrap my arms around his neck and press my body against his, opening wider to his kiss. Malix devours me, his teeth nipping at me, his tongue swirling with mine, penetrating me in a way that reminds me too much of our night together. I melt into his arms and his hands roam my body beneath the robe, his fingertips searing into my skin like a memory.
I lose track of time in his arms, beneath his hands. I lose track of myself, my own consciousness, and I’m nothing more than a bundle of nerves and need and desperate desire to feel his bare skin against mine. To let him sink into me.
The out of control feeling is too much. Even as pleasure spirals through me, a sharp bite of panic jolts through my brain like an electric shock.
No.
No.
No!
I pull away from him, breaking the kiss as I gasp for breath. Then I rear back and punch him in the face, catching him on the jaw just below his sculpted cheekbone. His head jerks to the side, and I don’t wait to see how he’ll respond. If he’ll fight me or fuck me, kiss me or kill me.
Instead, I just stalk back inside the cabin and leave him standing like a shadow in the sunshine.
