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“He’s no one to you.”
“He’s Jordan’s father; and you are everything to me.”
She squeezed her eyes. Tears stormed her defences.
Sensing a gap in her defensive wall, he said quietly, earnestly, “I was a different man back then, azeezi. I would not stand before you, knowing what is at stake, understanding what you’ve been through, asking you to trust me, if I did not believe myself to be worthy of your trust. I would sooner die than hurt you and Jordan.”
He reached up, cupping her face. “I saw last night what I was. I remembered how low I sunk. And I am here now with a heart that is full of hope. If you let me into your life I will know that I have come as far from that despair and dark misery as it is possible to come. I will be the embodiment of euphoria.”
“This isn’t fair,” she said, her voice wobbly. “You speak so beautifully that I think I could forgive you almost anything.” She looked up at him, and she knew she was seeing him as he really was. “I’m scared,” she said simply.
He nodded. “I understand that. It will take time to prove to you that I am worthy of our future.”
“That’s not what scares me,” she interrupted, quietly but with a determination that came from her heart. “I’m scared of how much I want you. I’m scared of how completely I trust that you are good and right, even after learning of your past. I am scared of losing you; and I’m scared of a future that might not include you.”
Her words dropped heavily into the room. Only the faint sound of Christmas carols softened the barbed quiet.
“And why would it not include me?” He prompted.
“Because you’re from Dashan and I live here …”
“Have I ever indicated, by words or deeds, that I wish to return to my homeland?” He lowered his voice, hoping his earnestness would convey itself to her. “I want to be with you. I want to be with you always. I feel more at home here, in your flat, than in any of my palaces.”
“Any of your palaces?” She groaned. “See? This is too much. We’re just from different worlds!”
“So?”
“So that’s a big deal! All of this is.”
“No more so than any two people who fall in love. It is always a big deal, no?”
She stared at him long and hard and finally, she nodded.
“What does this mean?” He asked, tentative in his relief.
“It means that I love you. And that I trust you. That I know someone who’s worked as hard as you have to turn your life around isn’t likely to stuff it up again.” She exhaled a shaky breath. “It means yes. To this. Yes.”
He pulled her tight to his chest, holding her as though if he let go it might all turn out to be a dream.
“Kelvin wants to trade cards,” Jordan said smugly, walking into the room.
Melinda startled, but when she tried to pull away, Ra’if held her tight.
He kissed her cheek then crouched down to Jordan’s eye-height. “Mind if I join you for lunch?”
“Nope.”
“What about if I start spending a little more time here?”
A frown pulled between Jordan’s eyes and Melinda held her breath. “Or …” Melinda held her breath, every cell in her body tense, waiting for Jordan to speak. “I mean, or we could spend time at your place,” he said diplomatically.
She burst out laughing.
“Yes, my place works too.” Ra’if stood and put an arm around Melinda and rested his hand on Jordan’s shoulder.
The ghosts of Christmasses Present and Future stood before him, and he liked what he saw. Finally. He liked it, a lot.
On Christmas day, surrounded by festive decorations, he found love and a wish he hadn’t remembered making was answered.
