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He stood abruptly, holding his hands down to her. She placed hers in them on autopilot, her face lifted to his. “Dance with me.”
“But the food…” She nodded to the table, then looked back up at Syed.
His expression was intense. “Please.”
She nodded then, her heart tensing as she stood and allowed him to fold her against him. His lips buzzed against the soft flesh at the base of her neck, one hand pressed firmly to the small of her back, holding her tight to him. They moved together, as one, as they always had.
Losing him had shaped her forever; but so had loving him. She kept her face close to his chest, listening to his heart, and slowly, softly, she spoke.
“You’re not the only one who had a deep hole right here,” she said quietly, running her fingers over his chest. “I missed you so much and I had no way of contacting you, no way of seeing you again.” Her eyes met his, fierce blue accusing him.
His expression was unreadable. Only his dark eyes showed a glimmer of shared pain. His voice too was husky and raw. “I told myself you’d move on. I wanted to come back to you. Six months after leaving, I even flew to America intending to arrive on your doorstep.”
“Why didn’t you?”
A muscle jerked in his cheek. The truth would infuriate her. No, offend her. He didn’t want to be an instrument of any further pain to this woman. “I couldn’t.”
“That’s not an answer.”
He locked his gaze to her. “I thought of what you had in life and I felt you wouldn’t be happy with me. Not knowing who I truly am, and the life I lead.” His eyes assumed a faraway quality as he studied her thoughtfully. “You were so full of joi de vivre, so vibrant and alive. The most truly spectacular woman I had ever known. Palace life would have been like caging a magnificent bird. I sacrificed what I wanted in the hopes you would be happier without me.”
She tilted her head away from him, her profile set and determined, her eyes showing the slightest hint of glassiness from the tears that were cloying in her throat.
“And now you don’t care about that?”
A flicker of impatience ran across his face. “Of course I care, Sarah. But I was wrong then. You would have been happier with me than you have been; your life in my palace would have avoided all of this you have dealt with on your own. But more importantly, I would have been with you, by your side, as your partner.”
“And if I’d gone with you? Lexi would have died, for certain.” Sarah swallowed past the horrible, unimaginable notion, pasting a smile on her face. “So maybe this all happened for a reason.”
He compressed his lips. “I don’t believe that, you know. I don’t believe all things happen for a reason. I am glad you were with her though.” He studied Sarah thoughtfully. “She’s so like you. It’s unusual, if you and your sister were only half-biologically related? And there’s her father, too.”
Sarah nodded. “I guess Cam and I were really alike. Just like our mom.” Her cheeks darkened. “Anyway. I guess you probably don’t want me talking too much about my family when we get to your … country.”
Her embarrassment shamed him. “I want you to be yourself. You’re who I married. Sarah Smith.”
“Sarah Smith who grew up poor as poor comes? Who can barely cover her bills? Sarah Smith who works in a bar serving beer to hard-working blue-collar guys?” She lifted her face to his, her eyes sparking despite the weary dejection he detected in her beautiful features. “That’s who you want me to be?”
“It’s who you are,” he said honestly. “You a
re also brilliant and beautiful. Kind and smart.” He lifted his hands to cup her face, and they stilled, standing so close but no longer moving. “You’re my wife.”
CHAPTER TEN
She felt as though she’d run a marathon. Sarah’s eyes were heavy, glued together by invisible mod podge, or so it seemed. She forced them open with a soft groan, blinking, trying to remember where she was, and why.
Her eyes settled on the blinds across the room. It was still pitch black outside, save for the buzz of electric lighting that always lit the sky here. In Manhattan.
In Syed’s home.
No, not his home. A place he stayed in America.
“Mommy?” The tremulous little voice had her sitting bolt upright at just the same moment Syed did. “I can’t sleep.”
“Okay, baby,” Sarah murmured, putting a hand on the bedside table to steady herself.
Only Syed stood first, scooping Lexi up. “You go back to sleep, Sarah. It’s fine.”
Sarah stared at the two of them, her heart squeezing with so many strong emotions. In the week since their hasty marriage, she’d seen for herself how good Syed was with Lexi. How kind and caring, gentle and patient. She nodded groggily and fell back against the pillows.
