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There was a snort, then, “Wait. You smoke?”
“For years. Every other night or so.” He was biting his cheek at this point, torn between wanting to laugh until he fell over or cried. Surely Barrett was just playing Ambrose’s game, avoiding mentions of something more obscene liketightly furled buds. He didn’t know Barrett, or his preferences.
“Shit,” Barrett said, more quietly now. “Well, look at us. Two lonely fuckers out in the woods smoking pot and enjoying the scenery.”
“That….honestly sounds okay to me.” He paused, the question weighing him down. He had to ask. “Lonely?”
The answer was immediate. “You’re not? Cause I’m not one to usually make assumptions about people I don’t know but uh…you don’t move to Lake Honor unprepared to be in all that quiet. Alone. I think everyone around there is lonely on some level. I know I am.”
This was too heavy a conversation for the phone. Too close to the truth. Ambrose stumbled over his words, trying to catch them even as they tumbled out of his mouth without his permission. “I think I am, too.”
A sound, like a sigh or a breath being blown out. Ambrose could almost feel it over the phone. “Well, we’re neighbors. I wouldn’t mind being friends. Could use one right about now.” And then Barrett chuckled and Ambrose realized he liked that sound; the rumbling bass of it, the echo in his bones that didn’t feel so hollow. “I’ll be gone another couple of days. Keep an eye on the house for me? The plants should be fine.”
“Yeah, sure.” What else could he say? It was a favor, an easy one, and it’s not like Ambrose minded. “Are you okay? You left fast.”
“Fuck, yeah, I uh….” There was a sound, like Barrett shifting the phone, and then the clear, deep bark of a dog. “I apparently now have a dog.”
“A dog?”
“Yeah, she’s my nephew’s but he’s sick so I suppose she’s mine for the time being. Say hi, Dandi.” Another bark, and then Barrett laughed. “Big dummy. She’s huge but cuddly.”
“I love dogs.” The words came so fast again. Ambrose wanted to slap himself. What was it about Barrett that made him want to just talk and talk, ramble and confess? “What kind is she?”
“A massive mutt. Honestly, I think mostly Great Dane but she’s not quite as big as one. Are you, Dandi?”
“Dandi?”
“Dandelion, but not easy to yell when she bolts. I’ll introduce you two when I get back.” Then Barrett fell quiet in that way that had Ambrose glancing at the phone screen as if the call dropped. “Thanks again. This shit sucks and I’m uh…a bit of a mess right now. I didn’t mean to dump anything on you.”
“It’s not dumping. I promise.”
“Okay. Good. Thanks. And I gotta go, but let me know what you like to eat.” Barrett laughed lightly and something eased through Ambrose’s chest. Relief, maybe? “Not fish, if you don’t mind. I’ve had my fill.”
Now that was a pity. Barrett’s carefully vacuum-sealed fish, packed with spices that reminded Ambrose of the best jambalaya he’d ever had, had been perfect. “Fair enough. I’ll text you.” And instead of saying goodbye, Ambrose said softly, “Text or call if you need an ear. Sometimes it’s hard to take all that on your own, Barrett.”
“Shit.” Ambrose liked the way he said it, the quiet rasp of it in his ear sending shivers down his spine. “That’s kind. You sure you want a stranger dumping their shit on you?”
“You saved my life. We’re not strangers.”
“We ain’t friends, either.”
“No, we’re not. Not yet.”
Another sigh. “Fair enough. I’m not easy to be friends with, Ambrose.”
“Me either.”
“Well, look at us. Two lonely fuckers out in the woods smoking pot and enjoying the scenery.” The repetition made Ambrose laugh and Barrett joined him after a few long seconds. “Thanks. Talk later?”
“Yeah, sounds good.”
The line clicked in his ear and, chuckling to himself, Ambrose left Barrett’s house and locked up. It was a lot for one day, but instead of feeling overwhelmed, he felt strangely better. Thinking about Preston had shoved things to the surface Ambrose would rather stay buried. Not the healthiest tactic, but he’d been in survival mode for so long, he wasn’t sure how to do anything else. Be anything else.
Maybe this was an actual new start.
The day passed in a blur, work and chores making him move, making him forget for a while. Ambrose was prepared to go to bed feeling drained but hopeful. And when Barrett’s text came in while Ambrose was curled up in a chair, reading, he jumped to answer. If he was being honest with himself, he’d been waiting for the phone to ding all day.
From: BarrettSorry I can’t talk more tonight. I was with my sister all day. My nephew woke up. I feel like someone hit me with a truck.
