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Fuck! This was a completely wasted trip since I’m leaving stressed out and thinking more about Snow than I did before I came here.
Garrison patted me on my back as we were leaving. “Everything ok brother? Who is she talking about?”
When we got outside, I looked at Garrison. “For fuck’s sake. Stop with the brother shit. I have seen you more this last week than I have for the last fifteen years. We are not brothers. You made that clear when you abandoned me.”
“That’s not fair.”
“How is it not fair?”
“That was father’s choice.”
“One that you didn’t stop or change.”
“Gage.” His face fell. “I was only thirteen. I didn’t really have much say, you know that.”
“I know you didn’t look like you gave two shits. Tell me. Did you ever try to find me?”
“Gage.”
I held up my hand. “I don’t want to hear it.”
“Well, I do want you to know I’m sorry. I thought about you.”
“Thinking about me didn’t do shit.” I whirled around on him. “Do you know what it was like for me?” I continued to walk and then circled back. “I was eight years old. Eight fucking years old and I was on my own. Do you know what assholes do to eight-year-olds who are on their own?”
He shook his head.
“No. You don’t and trust me… you don’t want to know. I learned real quick that no one was my friend. They all wanted to use me, just like father did. A means to an end. That’s what I was.” I laughed. “What’s funny is that father got what he wanted. I had my first kill on my ninth birthday. So I became what he wanted… granted, it wasn’t a kid, but some jackass who thought he could have his way with me.”
“Shit.”
“Yea.” I smirked and continued walking.
“I’m sorry.”
“Save it because the ‘I’m sorry’s don’t do shit for me.”
The rest of the walk to our house was quiet.
I expected to see Snow and Enzo there, but the house was empty.
I tried not to think about what they were doing or where they were doing it at. The look in her eyes… the hurt… I could tell she wanted to lash out at me and the way she and Enzo had their arms around one another…
“So, what are we going to do here?” Garrison asked, looking around.
“This is my home. I need to talk to Barrett to see if he’s ok with you crashing here for a little while.”
“Why wouldn’t he?”
I cut my eyes at him. I didn’t need to go into the details of what Barrett thought of him. Garrison had a slight point that he was only thirteen, but still… something could have been done. It didn’t help that we weren’t close beforehand. I was always some little errand boy for him instead of a brother.
I peeked out the window, expecting the boy’s home any minute, and right on cue, I saw Barrett walking up the trail. I walked outside to meet him and noticed his face fell when he saw Garrison walk out behind me.
I heard Gideon mumble something about picking up strays, but ignored it.
I bounded down the stairs and met Barrett. “Can we talk?” I said under my breath.
He nodded, and we peeled away to stand by the large oak tree on the other side of the vegetable garden.
