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Chapter 24
Somehow,even before he says anything at all, I know he’s not actually about to tell me everything.
Why reveal all your moves when the game is nowhere near over?
Kal shifts me up his lap, maneuvering me so my ass is cradled by his forearm, partially resting on the chair, and I’m somewhat looking down at him. It feels like a silent acquiescence, like because he knows he can’t very well give me all his secrets, he can at least give me some of the power.
He slips his left hand between my thighs, and for a second I think he’s about to try and distract me by gliding up and under my dress, but he doesn’t. His fingers squeeze once, then settle on a solid grip, and he looks at me as though waiting for me to proceed.
I wring my hands together and shrug. “To be honest, I don’t know where to begin.”
“We don’t have to go over a lifetime of issues in one afternoon. Why don’t you start with what bothers you the most, not knowing?”
He’s so logical, so levelheaded, that it almost makes me feel stupid for even coming in here at all. Even though it’s obvious that my slight freak out was an extension of something bigger, at least to me, embarrassment weaves a gnarly tapestry in my chest, impossible to ignore.
I nibble on the inside of my cheek, racking my brain. “Are you sleeping with anyone else?”
“Would it trouble you if I was?” he asks, glancing down at where his hand sits. “For reasons... other than risking your health?”
Dropping my gaze to his collarbone, peeking out from where I’ve pulled down his shirt, I weigh the consequences of admitting the truth. Of breaking myself open for a man I’m already aware can’t ever love me, and how it might feel to bleed out for once and not have him blot up the mess.
But I always did like the pain.
“Yes,” I mutter, my tongue still not completely on board with my heart.
His fingers flex, the metal of his wedding band icy as it presses into me. A hard look passes over his face, causing his pupils to dilate, but the rest of him remains perfectly still. “No. I’m not.”
Breath whooshes from me, relief draining my lungs, and I start to move onto the next question, my mind firing full speed ahead, when the hand on my thigh clamps down, shooting a sharp spark of pain down the length of my leg.
The area blossoms bright red, and he relaxes his hold right when I move to shove him away, smoothing the pads of his fingers over the site.
“Ow,” I say, annoyance flaring in the pit of my stomach.
“I think the better question, though, is why you think I’m sleeping with someone else.” Now, his hand does inch up, the tip of his middle finger disappearing beneath the hem of my dress, pausing there. “Was I unclear about the fact that our marriage is real?”
I shake my head. “No, it’s just—”
“Just what? Insecurity? Jealousy?” Another inch slips past, and my breath hitches as he grazes the scarred K. “I’ll admit, your jealousy is fucking delectable, little one. Gets me hard as a goddamn rock just thinking about it.”
As if on some sort of cue, I feel his erection stiffen beneath me, straining against the fabric of his suit pants. Moisture collects between my legs, flushing my body with need.
Raising my eyebrows, I tear myself from watching his ascent, goose bumps sprouting along my skin. “Don’t most people think jealousy is bad?”
“Less evolved folks than me, perhaps. Or more, depending on how you look at it.” I gasp as he brushes the tip of a finger over my core, the sweep brief and featherlight, as if he’s just testing the waters. “But what it tells me, with us, is that you’re as fucking crazy as I am.”
I blink, my heart actually stalling out inside my chest. “What?”
“The thought of you even looking at someone else fills me with an indescribable ache,” he says, punctuating the last word by thrusting a finger into my sex, making room where there previously was none. “An ache I have no right to feel, no right to indulge, but God, I can’t help it sometimes. Anyone glances in your direction, and I’m tempted to rip their fucking heart out. I like knowing you feel it too.”
He curls against me, stroking slowly, maddeningly, and my head falls back onto my shoulders, my neck practically snapping in half with the sudden weight.
Chest rising and falling in time with the motion of his finger, he watches me with parted lips and hooded lids, like he’s growing aroused with each stuttered breath expelling from my lungs.
“Do you get it, little one?” he says, plunging two more fingers inside me, spreading them so I’m stretching around him, desperate to be filled. “No one awakens that sensation in me, so how could I ever find myself drawn to another’s bed? You make me feel...”
My soft gasp distracts him, my orgasm pooling at the base of my spine, coiling so tight it makes my body bow inward. The squelching sounds coming from where he pushes in and out of me reverberate off the office walls, so loud I wonder if they won’t absorb through the plaster and reach the ears of the customers outside.
Somehow, without ever removing his fingers from inside of me, Kal lifts and backs me up so we’re plastered against the door, snaking his free hand down the length of my body; he yanks the neckline of my dress beneath my breasts, thrumming one pebbled nipple, before dropping to his knees.
