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Harrison smiles as he approaches, as friendly as ever. “Hi, Cassia.”
“Hi, Harrison,” I reply.
We haven’t spoken since he stayed behind at Fellini’s after his teammates left and hung out with me, Sydney, and Graham. Honestly, that’s the last time I thought about him—until Holden brought him up at the basketball court.
“How’ve you been?” he asks.
“Um, okay.”
Harrison nods, understanding. He knows I’m best friends with Sydney. Which is useful, honestly. I’d be just as affected by Mr. Adams’s death if Holden had been his only child becauseit affected Holden. It’s easier to hide how much I care about Holden under the guise of how recent events have affected my best friend, which makes me feel spectacularly shitty.
“You doing anything tonight?”
“No,” I answer, honestly. Sydney is going over to Graham’s. I was planning to watch a documentary and go to bed early, like a geriatric spinster.
“Jack Randall is having a party. If you want to hang out…I’ll be there.”
“I’ll think about it,” I tell him.
“Okay,” he replies, smiling before he walks away.
I told myself to move on. Holden told me to move on.
But still…I’m conflicted.
Three hours later, I park in front of Jack Randall’s house. After a twenty-minute speech on what I should be aware of at a high school party, my parents told me it was okay for me to go.
I was shocked. Part of me told them so I wouldn’t be able to come. So it wouldn’t be a possibility.
Instead, they endorsed it. Said they were happy I was going out. I guess I haven’t hidden my heartbreak over Holden as well as I thought. It’s a new low—when your parents think you’re pathetic.
Maggie fussed over my hair and outfit. I’m wearing skinny jeans and a top I never would have picked out for myself, my hair straight and my eyes smoky.
I feel good. I’m also scanning the other vehicles parked as I walk toward the front door, looking for a familiar truck. There’s still no sign of it when I reach the front door.
It’s unlocked. I step inside, the scent of beer and sweat immediately reminding me of the only other high school party I’ve been to. I push away the memories forcibly.
Holden wants me to move on.
Told me to move on.
Living in the past won’t do me any good.
I spot Harrison as soon as I enter the living room. He walks over to me right away.
“Hey!”
“Hi,” I reply, tugging the hem of my borrowed shirt anxiously. I’m awkward and uncomfortable. Proud of myself for coming and also ready to leave.
“You want a drink?”
“I’m driving.”
“There’s soda, Cassia.”
“Oh. Okay, sure.”
Harrison smiles at me and then guides me into the kitchen. He grabs me a ginger ale, which I sip on as he introduces me around.You know Cassia, right?is a constant refrain.
