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“This is about the time. It’s actually a little early, according to what I’ve read. I hope time doesn’t go by too fast.”
“Me either. I’m still in the one-day-at-a-time mode. If I concentrate too much, it will make me crazy.”
“Me too,” she said, so relieved she hadn’t given him any other news. “I love you, Dave.”
“I love you, too. You’d better get some sleep.”
They kissed, and he fell asleep with his hand on his baby.
***
For the next two months, Katrina worked harder than she ever had before. Working and having a lot to do helped her focus on the positive; she was madly in love with Dave, and they were going to have a baby together.
Not telling him the doctor’s dire prediction was easy because she was in denial. The little boy would be healthy and happy and above all,normal.At the appointment the month before, the doctor reminded her to listen to podcasts she’d recommended and read blog posts, and she ignored the advice.
But then, as her belly ballooned out, a little preparation was in order. Her well-being crashed to the ground, as she finally listened to podcasts and read about the possibilities. She needed to tell Dave soon, before she could tell friends and family which the podcasts recommended.
The time for her six-month appointment arrived. Dave wasn’t able to go, and she was fine with it, still trying to protect him. It was another Friday, the beginning of another weekend.
“I have your latest blood work right here. Because of the results of the first trimester ultrasound, we ran a test at twenty weeks that we can compare with the early blood test. It will give us an idea of the probability of your baby having trisomy 21. It’s an extra chromosome.”
“I know what it is. I Googled it.”
“Please don’t Google anymore,” the doctor replied. “It won’t be helpful. You can call me anytime, Katrina. I hope you’ve been listing to the podcasts. If you must go online, there are some wonderful blogs where parents of children with Down syndrome share their experiences.”
“I’ve been reading and listening. I’m not sure how helpful it is…”
The doctor nodded.
“You’ve spent months processing the unknown. You’ll get to where you can’t do anything else until you see him at birth.”
Taking a deep breath, Katrina had reached a turning point.
“I’m there now. I’m ready for answers. I’m ready to share the news with Dave.”
“Okay, this will just take a moment.” The doctor turned her back, giving Katrina privacy for a few more minutes while she looked over Katrina’s chart.
When she finished, she looked at Katrina with compassion. Katrina’s heart fell, already knowing what the answer would be.
“The probability is high that your little baby boy has trisomy 21, or Down syndrome. Katrina, I can only tell you what the mothers and fathers I’ve talked to say about this. Once your baby is in your arms, you’ll find out that he simply needs the same things all babies need. Everything else, the special interventions, you’ll plan for later. Right now, you just need to take care of you and Dave and make sure you’re okay. And that means you need to trust Dave with the news.”
With the breath knocked out of her, nothing could have prepared her for this. She was so glad she wasn’t certain almost six months ago, and that she’d protected Dave from it. Getting through each day would have been insufferable. Then she thought of something.
“There’s still a chance he won’t have it, correct?”
With her hands gripped together, Katrina imagined being in their bedroom at Creole Cottage, telling Dave that their baby would have Down syndrome. Did he even know what it was?
“There’s still a chance. You could have an amniocentesis to be sure.”
“No. There’s no need. He’s healthy, correct? His heart and his body were fine in the first test.”
“Why not have another ultrasound just for peace of mind?”
The doctor waited patiently for Katrina to decide. Her mind was whirling. What could they find out that was worse? The thought petrified her, but she needed to be honest with Dave. She’d include him in the decision making.
“Okay. I’ll have an ultrasound. I’ll schedule it for when Dave can come.”
On the way home she debated how to tell him. Was it fair to him to hear bad news that could ruin their weekend? The doctor had said something that resonated. “Trust Dave with the facts.”
