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I felt his nod. “I had to eat the candy,” he whispered in that same sad voice. “Just to survive.”
My whole body shook with laughter. “You ate my candy?” I demanded. “The candy you brought forme? You’re such a fucking Wellbridge.”
Then JT was laughing, too, his arms tightening to hold me against him as we both doubled over at our utter ridiculousness. And suddenly, wewereokay. More okay than before. Because JT was a good man—a man who knew when I needed to be held, and when I needed to be held down, when I needed tender truths and when I needed teasing.
In short, JT Wellbridge knew me better than I ever would have believed.
Which meant I was more screwed than I’d ever dreamed.
I ended the embrace quickly and stepped back to press a kiss to his cheek. “Thank you for that. For being… you.”
“Baby,” he began softly.
“Not now.” I shook my head. “I can’t anymore. Let’s go to bed, okay? Nothing’s gonna change tonight.”
He nodded, and we moved together to the sink, where we brushed our teeth shoulder to shoulder in the tiny space. It wasn’t until we’d made our way up to the loft and slid into bed with my head pillowed on JT’s lightly furred chest that he spoke again.
“I had feelings for you back in high school, Firecracker. I had feelings for you three years ago. I have feelings for you now.”
The admission was sweetly painful. It was good to know that I wasn’t alone. Terrible to know that, just as I’d predicted back in Ogunquit, this disaster would end up hurting us both.
JT ran a finger over the crown tattoo on his wrist, tightening his arm around me with the movement. I’d noticed him doing that before when he was upset about something.
“Tell me about your tattoo,” I said, trying to change the subject to something less devastating, less likely to tear my heart to pieces later.
He let out a huff of warm air against my forehead. “You asking for proof of my feelings for you?”
I propped myself up on my elbow to look at him. “What does your tattoo have to do with your feelings for me?”
He looked back down at the crown, bold and masculine. Permanent.
JT’s long finger traced it on his skin. “This is you.”
I grabbed his wrist and looked more closely at the tattoo, as if the design alone held an explanation. “I don’t understand.”
He tilted my chin up until our eyes met. The edge of his lip was curved with a kind of knowing that made my heart expand. “For years, you told me you were the king of the lake.” He shrugged. “So I gave you a crown.”
My world tilted on its axis until I felt like I would faint right there in my bed. No longer was it exhaustion pulling me down but the sheer heavy knowledge that I’d found my person. The man I wanted most in the world, the one who’d carried me with him for years on his very skin.
“But we can’t… I mean you… I… it can’t work… right?” My lips felt numb, and my fingers tingled.
JT blew out a breath. “I’ve been thinking on this for weeks, it feels like. There are parts of my job that are driving me crazy, like I told you before… but there are parts of it that I really like. It’s part of my identity. I don’t want to give all of that up.”
I swallowed. “I would never ask you to. I feel the same about my business.”
“I can’t work remotely, and neither can you. And I’ve thought about coming back here for the weekends, even though it’s less than ideal…”
“But…?” I prompted.
“But I’m not going to lie. That commute would kill me. I can’t imagine doing it every weekend. And the weekends are your busiest time anyway. So I don’t know what the solution is yet. But I’m going to find one,” he said firmly. “Trust me.”
“Sure.” I wanted to believe him. But evidence was not on our side.
“Let’s just get through Brew Fest, then worry about it.”
I made a sound of agreement, though I didn’t agree at all. And if he thought I could simply not worry about it until after Brew Fest, he didn’t know me very well.
In fact—I yawned hugely—I was probably going to stay up all night worrying about it.
