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“So what will it be, Lidiya Petrovna?”
Lidiya
What will it be?
It’s all I can do not to start shaking as I look up at Levin.He can’t do this,I think wildly, but it’s rapidly becoming apparent to me that he can.
I don’t fully understand who this man is, what he does or who he works for—although I don’t believe it’s just a fucking private detective agency anymore, that’s for sure—but I’m beginning to believe that he can do just about whatever the fuck he wants. I know someone must have heard me screaming earlier when I’d tried to escape—I’d purposefully tried to be noisy enough that someone might come to my rescue or call the police, but the hall outside of the room has been dead silent.
Whoever Levin really is, whoever this boss is that he’s mentioned, it’s becoming clear to me that he is, to some extent at least, above the law. That the people who should protect others like me turn a blind eye to the things that he, and the men he works for and with, do.
I grip the edge of the bed tightly, forcing myself not to shake, not to cry, but tothink.
He’s going to keep me in this hotel room, that much is plain. He wants me to get back with Grisha, so that I can find out information that he hasn’t yet shared with me what it is. And then—what?
He takes the information, fucks off, and I go back to my life, feeling like shit after spending god knows how much time in the bed of a man who now makes me feel physically nauseous?
The thought of it makes me want to hurl all over again.
“I can’t believe this,” I whisper, swallowing hard. “You’d put an old woman at risk to force me to—”
“Not me,” Levin corrects, and I glare up at him.
“What? You’re just the poor messenger? I’m sorry, but I’m not fully buying that. Your boss is putting you up to this, fine. But you’re still working for a man like that, which makes you—”
Levin lets out a frustrated sigh, sinking back down in his own seat. I blink at him with surprise—I could make a break for it now, if I wanted to, though I still think he’d manage to stop me before I could get out of the door. His retreat makes me feel obligated to do the same, though, which is probably what he was going for.
Either way, I sink back down onto the edge of the bed, and we stare at each other across the foot of space, at an impasse.
“I don’t think you want your boss to know that I’m being a pain,” I tell him, narrowing my eyes. I might not know of any good way out of this—especially since I believe he really will do what he’s threatening and cut off my accounts—but that doesn’t mean I’m going to roll over without a fight. “I think it would threaten your job too, if he knew how much trouble you were having with one girl—”
“I wouldn’t be having so much trouble, if I weren’t circumspect in my methods,” Levin says with a growl, a warning in his voice. “And I can tell you, Lidiya, my boss is not. Most of the men who work for him–I’d say all of the men, though I hate generalizing–aren’t either.”
“So you’ve said.”
“Don’t be glib.” Levin narrows his eyes right back at me. “You don’t want someone else being brought in to deal with this, Lidiya. You might think I’m a monster, but I’m a fucking angel compared to the other men who work with me. I won’t hurt you, or violate you, I won’t make you bleed or cause you any pain. Physical pain, anyway,” he adds, his mouth twisting a little at the corners. “I’m sure you feel that having to go back to Grisha is causing you emotional pain right now. And I don’t enjoy that, but it is a necessary evil of my job. Putting a stop to Grisha’s machinations is more important—”
“More important than my happiness? Than my grandmother’s health?”
“Yes.” The word is clipped, and Levin sits back, his piercing blue eyes fixed on mine. “I don’t know you, Lidiya, and you don’t know me. When this is finished, we’ll have nothing more to do with each other. But the fact that I don’t know you means I don’t have the sympathy that you seem to expect me to have.”
“I don’t think you know what the word means.”
“Be that as it may.” He folds his hands together, looking at me calmly. “You have a decision to make, Lidiya. So make it. Or don’t—but I can tell you that if you don’t, I’ll begin the process of making calls to have your accounts frozen.”
“I want to be paid.” I blurt out the words unceremoniously, and Levin raises an eyebrow.
“Oh, Lidiya. I hadn’t thought you were so mercenary.”
“You, callingmemercenary?” I glare at him. “Anyway, I phrased that wrong. It’s not me that I want you to pay. I want the money to go to mybabushka.You can put it my account and then have it transferred to her, but it’s not for me. She deserves more than what I can send her, and—”
“Ten thousand.” Levin says it with the calmness of a man who expected that this might be an outcome. “Don’t push your luck either, Lidiya, I’m already being quite generous.”
“Ten thousand rubles is nothing—”
“Ten thousand dollars. US currency. I’ll convert it to rubles.” He looks at me evenly. “That’s all the bartering I’ll do, Lidiya, and I mean it. Now I need an answer.”
I stare at him, my heart in my throat. I don’t want to do it. Everything in me rebels at the thought of going back to Grisha, of saying and doing the things necessary to carry out the mission that Levin seems determined to involve me in. It hasn’t even been a full day since the events of this morning that resulted in us breaking up, but so much has happened since then that I feel as if it’s been weeks.
