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Cassie shook her head, unable to believe what was happening. Giancarlo saying such personal and loving things to her—and in front of the radiographer, too. Because he didn’t do demonstrative. She remembered the way he’d railed at her in the shop in Paris for daring to jeopardise his reputation—but he didn’t seem to care about his reputation at the moment.
‘I don’t know what to say,’ she whispered, biting her lip with dread as she felt the cold dab of two paddles being applied to her abdomen—and quickly she turned her head away from the black and white blur of the TV monitor. ‘I’m so scared.’
‘Then say nothing—let me say it. Let me try and distract you from your fear, my love. Please, my darling—my brave darling. I love you, Cassie—and what I want is for you to carry on being my wife and for us to make more babies together. Only I know that I’ve probably blown it. That you have every right to tell me it’s over—and to walk away. And if you do that, then I am going to miss you and ache for you—but I will accept it. I will let you go because I love you and I want what is best for you. I will give you your freedom, cara mia—if that’s what you want.’
It was the selflessness in his statement which made her waver. The idea that Giancarlo wanted, not what he desired—but what was best for her. Through the shimmer of her tears she looked at him and drew a deep, shuddering breath. ‘But I don’t want my freedom.’
There was a pause. ‘You don’t?’
‘Of course I don’t! Why would I want to be free of the man I love?’
In the midst of their terrible grief, their eyes met as they sought to make some sense of their fractured world—as if wanting to bolster themselves with shared comfort—before they faced the pain which awaited them.
‘I could have been a better husband,’ he whispered.
‘And I could have been a better wife.’
‘And you will both be better parents if you stop all this soul-searching and have a look at this little heartbeat instead,’ came the crisp interjection of the radiographer.
Giancarlo stilled. ‘Scusi?’
‘Wh-what did you say?’ stumbled Cassie.
The radiographer smiled—as if she had suddenly discovered why getting out of bed at two o’clock on a cold winter night could be so worthwhile. ‘Look,’ she said gently. ‘You see that throbbing little bit there? That’s your baby’s heart.’
Fingers of fire clutched Giancarlo’s own heart. ‘You mean—?’
‘Your baby’s alive, Mr Vellutini. Very much alive. Look, here are the little arms—can you see the tiny fingers? And the legs? Sturdy-looking legs they look too, from where I’m standing.’
‘B-but…I bled,’ protested Cassie shakily—and the eyes which had been unable to face looking at the scan now began to devour every bit of the screen for some kind of information about the life which—miraculously—was still growing inside her.
‘It’s not uncommon,’ said the radiographer. ‘It’s nature’s way of telling Mum to relax. Do you think you’ll be able to do that in future, Mrs Vellutini—to relax?’
Scarcely able to believe how her world could turn from desolate dark to gleaming bright in the space of a heartbeat, Cassie looked up into Giancarlo’s face. And a wide smile threatened to split her face in two. ‘Oh, I think so,’ she said, laughing.
‘I will make sure of it,’ he vowed softly. ‘I will do everything in my power to look after my wife.’ And he lifted Cassie’s fingertips to his lips.
‘Then I’ll leave you both alone for a moment,’ said the radiographer diplomatically. ‘Come out when you’re ready.’
But they scarcely noticed the kindly woman leave, they were too overwhelmed by the gift they had been given—of the new life which still grew inside her and a tentative new love which would also flourish, if they let it.
‘And we will let it,’ vowed Giancarlo fiercely. ‘Tell me how I can ever make it up to you, mia cara Cassie?’
She looked into his face and saw the tears which were glinting in the depths of his black eyes—surprised to see such a depth of emotion on the face of someone so essentially masculine as Giancarlo. But, in a way, being honest enough to show his feelings like that only made him seem more of a man, if that were possible.
‘We won’t ever dwell on the bad things which have happened in the past,’ she whispered. ‘Only all the good things—and those we will cherish and learn from.’
Learn from. Giancarlo nodded. Yes, he would learn. They would learn from each other.
